Blonde Jokes

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There is a blonde, a brunette and a redhead in Grade 5. Which of the girls has the largest вrеаsтs?
The blonde one, she’s already 18.

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One blonde says to the other:
"I did a pregnancy test."
The other nods appreciatively and asks, "And, were the questions really hard?"

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One blonde says to another:
“I don’t know, this business with the pyramids being over 4000 years old. I mean, we’ve only got 2021, haven’t we?”

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A cashier in the cinema asks a blonde customer, „Tell me, you’ve already been here three times in the past 10 minutes, why do you want yet another ticket?”
The blonde replies, “Well I only wanted to get one, but the guy up front always tears it up!”

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A blonde hits another car. The other driver goes berserk and yells, "Did you even do a driving test you sтuрid соw?"
The blonde replies with dignity, "Yes, and probably a lot more times than you did!"

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A blonde girl calls her boyfriend at work, "Darling, I'm doing this jigsaw puzzle but I just can't figure it out. All the pieces look the same."
"And do you have the picture of what it's supposed to look like in the end?"
"Yes, there is a red rooster on the box. But it just doesn't seem to work out."
"Well don't worry about it, we'll look at it in the evening together."
When he comes home in the evening, the blonde shows him the puzzle. After a long silence, he says,
"Alright, now we'll just put those cornflakes back and not mention it again."

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Why don't blondes get sick very often?
Viruses and bacteria also have their pride!

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Do blondes suffer from headaches? No. Why not?
No brain, no pain!

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A dumb blonde, smart blonde, and the Easter Bunny are walking down the street. There is a $100 bill on the ground. Who picks it up?
The dumb blonde. The other two are imaginary.

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A blonde dies her hair brown... what do you call it?
Artificial intelligence

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What did the Asian man say to his wife when the hospital nursery tried to send them home with a blonde hair, blue-eye baby?
Hmmm... two Wongs don't make a white.

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A blonde, a gingеr and a bald man walk into a live music bar.
The doorman refuses entry to the gingеr, because the band is playing soul music.

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A blonde bursts out the doctor's office, yelling that the doctor flirted with her.
The staff rush to see what was going on, they asked her, "What did he do?"
She replied, "He told the nurse he'll check me out!"

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A blonde asks what time is it. He replies it's 5 before 7
The blonde says: so it's 2?
Source: Joke was told to me in Russian. English it might not read well. Since jokes aren't allowed to be written in other languages here, I wrote an English variant.

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Three blondes found some tracks...
The first blonde said,
"Those are bear tracks!"
The second blonde said,
"No, those are deer tracks!"
The third blonde said,
"No those are dog tracks!"
And that was when the train hit them.

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I told my girlfriend I was unfaithful
My girlfriend found blonde hair on the passenger seat of my car, so I had to say that I was cheating on her.
How embarrassing would it be if she knew I sold corn on the freeway?

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A blonde and a brunette is sitting on a bench.
Out of nowhere, the brunette says: Look! A dead bird!
The blonde gazes up into the air says where?

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I was just boasting at work about how I'm currently sleeping with a set of twins...
All the lads were very impressed but one asked;
"How do you tell them apart?"
"Easy", I said,
"Michelle has long blonde hair and Dave has a moustache."

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