The Essential Guide to Women: Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No Im sorry = Youll be sorry We need = I want It's your decision = My correct decision should be obvious by now Do what you want = Youll pay for this later We need to talk = I need to complain Sure go ahead = I dont want you to Im not upset = Of course Im upset, you moron Youre so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep Do you love me? = Im going to ask for something expensive How much do you love me? = I did something today youre going to hate Ill be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, youre dead]
The Essential Guide to Women:
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
Im sorry = Youll be sorry
We need = I want
It's your decision = My correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = Youll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure go ahead = I dont want you to
Im not upset = Of course Im upset, you moron
Youre so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = Im going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today youre going to hate
Ill be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, youre dead]