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It was late one night when a man walked into a bar. He sat down and asked the bartender to bring him a вееr. The bartender did. So the man quickly drank down the вееr, then looked into his pocket, sighed, and asked the bartender for another вееr. So once he recieved this вееr, the man again drank it down, after that he looked into his pocket again, sighed, and ordered another вееr.
Now this went on for quite some time. and each time the man finished a вееr he would look into his pocket and then order another. now the bartender had begun to get suspicious so he said,
"Hey man, how come every time you drink a вееr you look into your pocket?" now the man replied,
"Well... I have a picture of my wife in my pocket. and i keep on drinkin' until she looks good, and then i go home."
A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon.
When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well, how was the honeymoon?" asked the mother.
"Oh mamma!" she exclaimed. "Tthe honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic!" No sooner had she spoken the words than she burst out crying. "But mamma . . . as soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible language. Hes been saying things Ive never heard before! All these awful 4-letter words! Youve got to come get me and take me home... please mamma!"
"Now Sarah . . ." her mother answered. "Calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words has he been using?"
"Please dont make me tell you, mamma." wept the daughter.
"Im so embarrassed! Theyre just too awful! Youve got to come get me and take me home... please mamma!"
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset . . .
Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"
Still sobbing, the bride replied, "Oh, mamma . . . words like dust, wash, iron, and cook!"