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Dirty jokes

Newest jokes in this category

I know it doesn't look like a lot to you ladies, but believe me, we do a lot of сrар for that: fight wars, build bridges, pay cover....

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Dirty jokes

Can you fight the power... in my pants?

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Dirty jokes

I wonder if people with foot fetishes consider athletes foot an STD?

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Dirty jokes

When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?

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Dirty jokes

There was a man who couldn't talk properly and had a few issues in his head. One day he decided to go and by a bun for his lunch so he went to the bakery and said "I need a вuм, a вuм for lunch." so he got a bun and went to a hardware store to get a bucket "I need a f*cket, a f*cket to hold some water." The man then decide to go to the pet shop to by a cocker spaniel dog he said "i want a cocknstrokeit, a cocknstrokeit dog." As he was messed in the head he decided not to give it a name. When he was walking home with his cocknstrokeit, his f*cket and his вuм, his dog ran away and he said to the guy next to him, "Hold my вuм and f*cket, while i grab my cocknstrokeit.

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Dirty jokes Men jokes

Ladies, if a guy ever tells you he wants to cover you from head to toe in honey and liск it off inch by inch, that's a man who's never done it before.

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Dirty jokes Men jokes

I bet you're metric kilotons of fun.

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Dirty jokes

Just had a message from that girlfriend that she’s had a beautiful little girl weighing 7lbs 3oz. Coincidentally that’s the same size as my c*ck.

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Dirty jokes

Girl, are you a bowling ball? Because I want to finger you, throw you around and get you to come back for more.

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Dirty jokes

Can I drop my anchor in your lagoon? Yar!

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Dirty jokes

What did the gаy dentist say to the gаy patient?
Open wide!

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Dirty jokes

My foot isn't the only part of me that's lucky

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Dirty jokes

I'd love to get my hands on your termite mounds.

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Dirty jokes

If your legs were a restaurant, I'd be eatin out tonight.

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Dirty jokes

An Eskimo man awoke one day with the urge to go hunting for seal. After he had prepared his gear for his journey, he set out over the frozen ice to his favorite hunting spot.
About halfway there, his snowmobile started to run badly and make grinding noises. So the hunter decided to turn around and head back to his village. And, in fact, just as he pulled up to the local mechanic, his snowmobile died.
He went inside and spoke with the mechanic, who agreed to take a look and see what the problem was. The mechanic followed the Eskimo outside to the snowmobile, raised the hood and began to examine the engine.
After a few minutes, the mechanic looked up at the hunter and said, “I think that you've blown a seal.” No,” answered the hunter, “those are just icicles on my mustache.”

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Dirty jokes Men jokes

Q. What does a kfc box and a girl have in common?
A. After you eat them all out all you got is a greasy box to put your воnе in.

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Dirty jokes

Presumably at some point in the flight, she turned to him and said, 'My ears are popping. Have you got any hard candy?' And he said, 'No, no, I haven't, but I've got an idea.'

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Dirty jokes

Q. Why is a pair of trousers with the pockets cut out the best present you can give a teenage boy?
A. Because it’s something to wear and something to play with at the same time.

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Dirty jokes

I'll vote for the first person that just admits to anything. First person they walk up to and go, 'Excuse me, did you sleep with that woman?'
'Yeah! What's up, baby? How you doing, girl? Yeah, I slept with -- I'll sleep with her again! What's up, baby? What -- did I ever do drugs? Yeah, I did some drugs. Once? Sh*t, I don't know how many times I did drugs. Oh, I know I was doing her when I was doing the drugs.'

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Jokes about Women Dirty jokes

I was just talking to my grandma and she said that she regrets not learning how to drive, here's what she said "I regret not riding a bike because now I'm stuck with riding a 2 inch rust bucket." and she looked at my grandad. I was like What the actual f*ck!

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Dirty jokes