Jewish Jokes

Most popular in this category

Here, have some bacon. No. I'm Jewish. Relax, it's free.

1 0

Did you see the new Jewish movie?
I heard Israeli good.

0 0

What do you call the last answer on your Rabbi's trivia night?
The Final Solution to the Jewish Question

0 0

How did the Jewish boy do on his English test?
Hebrew it.

0 0

What's a Jewish kid's favorite game to play in the attic?
The silent game

0 0

Jewish jokes are unfunny
Anne frankly they are kind of offensive

0 0

All my Jewish friends must have really liked their summer camps
... Because they haven’t come back

0 0

Did you hear about the brand of brans that cause gase in Jewish people more then in others?
It's called Heinz Hitler

0 0

I tried to set up a new summer school in Isreal ...
For kids with ADHD, but now I am told the name of it, Jewish Concentration Camp won’t work 🧐

0 0

Why are Jewish funeral's so easy to plan?
Because they're already cremated

0 0

How did the Jewish brewery owner make his drinks?
Hebrew it

0 0

What do you call a Jewish theatre?
A cinemagogue. Sorry, I'm not sorry

0 0

A Jewish Nursing Students Final Exam
A nursing student, by the name of Esther is at her final nursing exam.
The examiner asks Esther, "How would you bathe the gеniтаls?"
She replies,
"The same way I would bathe the jews."

0 0

What did the Jewish Bostonian woman declare to her Sunday bridge group about her recent knitting project?
"I'm so AUtistic!"
EDIT: Ahtistic.

0 0

What do you call a family of jewish people who grow apples
Apple Jews

0 0

Didn't know so many Hispanic guys were Jewish
But I keep hearing them say Yahweh

0 0

You hear about the Jewish Mother Doll?
You pull the string and it rolls it eyes and says,
"AGAIN with the string?"

0 0

My dad's Christian and my mom's jewish and they LOVE recycling...
But it's a little awkward for both me and my grandad on ash wednesday. Sadly he didn't survive the holocaust.

0 0

What is the top selling protein with Jewish People (May be offensive)
YahWhey

0 0

People always complain that Jewish people have all the money.
Well if 6 million of your people died, you'd expect at least some inheritance

0 0

This election season has taught me a lot about what it must feel like to be a reasonable, level-headed Christian . . .
You really really like this one Jewish socialist guy, but you have a really hard time tolerating most of his other fans.

0 0

Why aren't Jewish people into rap?
They can't drop dimes

0 0

Why can't you insult Jewish people?
Because they've already been roasted.

0 0

Seven Jewish mothers are sitting in a restaurant...
And a waiter comes and asks:
"I'm sorry ladies, is *anything* all right?"

0 0

A Black Jewish Boy Runs Home To His Dad...
He asks his father, "Dad am I more Jewish or more black?"
"Why do you care?" responds the father.
"Because there is a kid selling a bike for $50 and I am considering whether to bargain for $40 or just steal it!"

1 0

Why do all Jewish guys have purple penises?
Because they're all tight-fisтеd wankers!

0 0

What's the name of the hat Jewish people are always seen wearing?
Oh yeah a Yankees hat.

0 0

Where did the Jewish boy go to get rid of his ADHD problem?
Concentration Camp.

0 0