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Latest Jokes

The moderators of The Joke Cafe rejected the joke I submitted about my реnis. …
They said it was too long.

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Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

Have you noticed that jokes starting with ‘have you noticed’ are usually shiт!

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Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

During the mating season a whale couple was trying to get a pregnancy started. They were interrupted by a whaling ship that tried to capture them. They resorted to running away and hiding behind a reef but the whaling ship kept looking for them.
The male whale got upset and said "This is too much. We are going to retaliate. I have a plan", he told his mate. "Let's swim under the whaling ship and with our вlоw holes вlоw hard and make boat rock. When the sailors fall into the ocean, we can swim up and gobble them up? What do you think?" he asked.
She looked a bit bored and said,
"Well, I don't mind the blowing but I won't swallow any sеамеn."

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Men jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

Man: He must be so happy!
Woman: Who?
Man: Your father.
Woman: Why?
Man: Because he gets to see an angel everyday.

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Jokes about Women Men jokes

Two guys went to a gas station that was holding a contest: a chance to win free sеx when you filled your tank. They pumped their gas and went to pay the male attendant.
“I’m thinking of a number between one and ten,” he said. “If you guess right, you win free sеx.”
“Okay,” agreed one of the guys, “I guess seven.”
“Sorry, I was thinking of eight,” replied the attendant.
The next week they tried again. When they went to pay, the attendant told them to pick a number.
“Two!” said the second guy.
“Sorry, it’s three, said the attendant. “Come back and try again.”
As they walked out to their car, one guy said to the other, “I think this contest is rigged.”
“No way,” said his buddy. “My wife won twice last week.”

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Men jokes Sex Jokes Stupid Jokes

A guy walks into his local воrdеllо and picks out a girl.
They go back to her room and start to discuss prices.
She says “It’s $100 for a вlоw job, $200 for straight sеx, and $250 for a Monica.”
“What’s a Monica?” he asks.
“That’s where I вlоw you now and sсrеw you later.” She answers.

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Sex Jokes

I went up to a girl at the bar last night.
“If you show me your тiтs, I’ll let you feel my соск,” I said.
“I don’t want to feel your соск, thank you very much!” she replied.
I thought “It’s nice to meet a girl who doesn’t want something in return for a change.”

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Sex Jokes Boob Jokes

My internet is so slow, it took 4 hours to jеrк off to a 20 second роrnо.

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Sex Jokes Internet Jokes

Рrоsтiтuте, new to the game was told by her рiмр “No sеx for the 1st 7days, just wanks”.
She asks, “Why only wanks?”, Рiмр says “Union rules, you gotta work a week in hand”

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Office and Work Jokes Sex Jokes

I was fuскing my secretary up the аrsе when my wife walked in.
She said, “You can’t do this to me!”
I said, “I know… that’s why I’m doing it to her.”

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Sex Jokes Secretary Jokes

Maybe we'd still be in the Garden of Eden if Eve had given Adam an Android instead of an Apple.

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Jokes

Music makes every day better, especially if you turn it up just loud enough to drown out all the people around you.

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Jokes

Gas prices are so high that when this college girl pulled into a gas station and asked for 2 dollar’s worth, the attendant dabbed some behind her ears.

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Jokes

Apparently racist chanting was heard at the England training ground earlier today. The FA have threatened to remove John Terry from the squad if he does it again.

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Sports Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes

I tried playing Uno with some mexicans today.... But the f*ckers kept stealing all the green cards!!

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes

A black bloke got on my bus this morning wearing a suit..
I said, “Where to, job centre or magistrates court?”

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes

Why do black people hate taking Tylenol? Because they have to pick the cotton out.

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes

PONTIAC stands for Poor Old Niggеr Thinks It's A Cadillac. BMW stands for Black Man's Wish.

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Men jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes BMW jokes

Since there are more Chinese people than any other race on Earth, does that mean they have normal eyes and we have big crazy googly ones?

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes

What do you call a black Poker player ?
The Sраdе of Aces

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes