A guy dies and wakes up to find he is in hеll. He's really depressed as he stands in the processing line waiting to talk to an admittance counselor. He thinks to himself "I know I led a wild life but I wasn't that bad. I never thought it would come to this." Looking up he sees that it is his turn to be processed into hеll. With fear and a heavy heart, he walks up to the counselor.Counselor: What's the problem, you look depressed? Guy: Well, what do you think? I'm in hеll.Counselor: Неll's not so bad, we actually have a lot of fun. Do you like to drink?Guy: Sure, I love to drink.Counselor: Well then, you are going to love Mondays. On Mondays we drink up a storm. You can have whiskey, ruм, tequila, вееr, whatever you want and as much a you want. We party all night long. You'll love Mondays. Do you smoke?Guy: Yes, as a matter of fact I do. Counselor: You are going to love Tuesdays. Tuesday is smoke day. You get to smoke the finest cigars and best cigarettes available anywhere. And you smoke to your heart's desire without worrying about cancer because you are already dead! Is that great or what? You are going to love Tuesdays. Do you do drugs?Guy: Well in my younger days I experimented a little.Counselor: You are going to love Wednesdays. That's drug day. You can experiment with any drug you want and you don't have to worry about overdoses or getting hooked because you are already dead. You are going to love Wednesdays. Do you gamble? Guy: Oh yes, I like to gamble.Counselor: You are going to love Thursdays because we gamble all day and night -- black jack, craps, poker, slots, horse races, everything! You are going to love Thursdays. Are you gаy? Guy: Well, no I'm not.Counselor: Oh [grimaces], you're gonna hate Fridays...
Στην κόλαση κάθε Πέμπτη A week in Hell Mann kommt in Hölle. Eines Tages starb ein Mann und fand sich in der Hölle wieder. Wie er in Verzweiflung durch die Hölle wandelte traf er zum ersten Mal den Teufel. Teufel: Warum bist du so... Un gars meurt et se retrouve en enfer. Vraiment il ne comprend pas pourquoi et ça l Phil wordt wakker in de hel en hij is een beetje slechtgehumeurd. Satan loopt voorbij en spreekt hem hierop aan. Satan: "Awel waarom zo Un uomo muore e va all En mand er lige død og står udenfor helvedes dør, og venter på at fanden lukker op. Døren bliver åbnet og fanden ønsker ham velkommen og byder ham indenfor til en introduktion om helvede. “Ryger du... João morreu e foi parar no inferno. Em clima de desespero, ele teve o primeiro contato com o Diabo: — Porque você está tão triste cara? — O que você quer? Estou no inferno! — O inferno não é tão... O sujeito morre e vai para o inferno. Ao vê-lo com ar entristecido, o Diabo apressa-se em apresentar-lhe as coisas boas. — Às segundas-feiras, nós fazemos aqui o Dia da Bebida... uísque, vinhos,... Villaggio turistico in una bella isola tropicale. Un distinto signore si presenta all’animatore del villaggio che gli da’ il benvenuto e gli illustra il programma della settimana: “Salve! Ben... Egy csávó meghal, és a pokolba kerül. Nagyban szomorkodik, amikor megjelenik előtte egy ördög: - Hát te mér En gammel feinschmecker er død, og til hans fortrydelse er det ikke Skt. Peter men djævelen der ta Moare un tip si ajunge in Iad. Vazandu-se acolo, il bufneste plansul Si in vreme ce hohotea asa, vine la el un Dracusor: - Ce faci ba, de ce plangi Asa? - Pai am ajuns in Iad. O sa ma Ardeti si o...