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Drug Jokes

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If the whole world smoked a joint at the same time, There would be world peace for at least two hours.
Followed by a global food shortage.
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Drug Jokes
Q: What is a stoners idea of a balanced diet?
A: A joint in each hand!
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Drug Jokes Diet and Weight Loss Jokes
Q: What do you call an apple pie getting high in Mcdonalds?
A: A baked apple pie.
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Drug Jokes
Q: What did the stoners girlfriend say?
A: If I can't marry a dude, i'll Mary Jane
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Drug Jokes
Q: What do get when you soak a spliff in Vоdка?
A: The Holy Spirit!
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Drug Jokes
Q: What do you call a potato that smokes wееd?
A: A baked potato.
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Drug Jokes
Q: What is the difference between a drunк and a stoner at a stop sign? 
A: The drunк guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
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Drug Jokes
Q: What do you call a stoner when hоrny?
A: A wееd wacker!
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Drug Jokes
Q: What did the frog say after lighting up?
A: Don't Worry be Hoppy?
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Drug Jokes
Q: How do you know when you have smoked enough рот ?
A: When you start looking around for the directions on how to use the lighter.
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Drug Jokes
Q: How do you know your a pothead?
A: You studied five days for a urinе test?
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Drug Jokes
Q: What do you do if you see a space man while getting high?
A: Park in it dude
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Drug Jokes
Q: What's the point of a wееd wacker? 
A: Wееd wackers need to wack it too!
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Drug Jokes
Q: What does a mermaid smoke?
A: Seaweed.
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Drug Jokes
I got high last night with Ted Mosby.
And now I can't remember "How I Met Your Mother"
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Drug Jokes
Q: Why did the рот head plant cheerios?
A: He thought they were donut seeds.
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Drug Jokes
Q: What do you call a person who remembers what they did at woodstock ?
A: A Liar.
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Drug Jokes
Q: What do you call it when a roach ash burns your shirt? 
A: A рот hole!
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Drug Jokes
Q: What is Reality?
A: An illusion caused by a lack of good wееd.
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Drug Jokes
A stoner called the fire department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" 
The Fireman asked "How do we get there?"
The stoner says "DUH, in a big red truck!"
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Drug Jokes
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