Horse jokes

Newest jokes in this category
L'avocat: - Sur les lieux de l'accident, n'avez-vous pas dit au policier que "vous ne vous étiez jamais senti aussi bien de toute votre vie" ? Le fermier : - C'est exact. L'avocat : - Et c'est... The following is a courtroom exchange between a defense attorney and a farmer with a bodily injury claim. It came from a Houston, Texas insurance agent. Attorney: "At the scene of the accident, did...
A farmer who's been involved in a terrible road accident with a large truck ended up in court fighting for a big compensation claim.
"I understand you're claiming damages for the injuries you're supposed to have suffered?" Stated the counsel for the insurance company.
"Yes, that's right," replied the farmer, nodding his head.
"You claim you were injured in the accident, yet I have a signed police statement that says that when the attending police officer asked you how you were feeling, you replied, 'I've never felt better inn my life.' Is that the case?"
"Yeah, but" stammered the farmer.
"A simple yes or not will suffice," counsel interrupted quickly.
"Yes," Replied the farmer.
Then it was the turn of the farmer's counsel to ask him questions. "Please tell the court the exact circumstance of events following the accident when you made your statement of health," his lawyer said.
"Certainly," replied the farmer. "After the accident my horse was thrashing around with a broken leg and my poor old dog was howling in pain. This cop comes along, takes one look at my horse and shoots him dead. "Then he goes over to my dog, looks at him and shoots him dead too. Then he come straight over to me and asked me how I was feeling. "Now, mate, what the heck would you have said to him?"
Lawyer Jokes Horse jokes Police Officer Jokes Farmer Jokes Dog jokes Insurance Comedy
Cowboy Talks to the Animals TALKING ANIMALS? Der Moslemflüsterer Един срещнал на полето овчар с куче, кон и една овца. Мужик приходит к председателю колхоза и говорит: Un ventriloquo arriva in un paese e vede un contadino seduto con un cane, un cavallo e una pecora: "Che bel cane! Ti spiace se gli parlo?".,E il contadino: "Questo cane non parla!".,Ma il ventriloquo insiste: "Hei cane, come va?".,E il cane: "Bene".,Il contadino e' un po'... Ein Christ trifft einen Türken mit einem Hund, Pferd und einer Ziege. Fragt der Christ: "Darf ich mit dem Hund reden?" Türke: "Hund kann nicht reden." Christ zum Hund: "Und wie geht es dir?" Hund: "Ganz gut, er füttert mich und geht 2 mal raus mit mir." Der Türke völlig verdutzt. Christ:... Un indien est en train de garder des chèvres. Un cow-boy se pointe et lui dit : - C'est ton chien ? - Lui être ! - Je peux lui parler un peu ? - Chien pas parler ! Bon, le cow-boy s'approche du chien. - Ca va ? - Pas mal ! (Stupeur de l'Indien...), - Cet Indien, c'est ton maître ? - Ouais. - Il... Een cowboy komt een dorpje binnen en ziet een indiaan aan de rand van zijn huis zitten. Cowboy: "Leuke hond heb je. Vind je het erg als ik met hem praat?" Indiaan: "Hond niet praten." Cowboy:... Een buiksprekende, Belgische toerist wandelt door een stadje in de woestijn en ziet een Marokkaan zitten. Belg : Hé, een leuke hond heb je daar. Mag ik er even mee praten ? Marokkaan : Hond niet... A traveling salesman goes to a farm house. The farmer goes, I could put you up for one night, but youll have to stay in the barn. So he spends the night there and the next morning the farmer comes... En bugtalende cowboy En bugtalende cowboy kommer ridende inde fra byen, og ser en indianer sidde ude foran sin tipi! Han synes lige, at han vil lave lidt sjov med indianeren, så han siger: "Hejsa,... Un paysan voit que ses bêtes ne sont pas dans leur assiette et décide de faire venir le vétérinaire : - Alors ? Quel est le problème ? - Je ne sais pas trop justement. - ? Il suffit de leur... Un touriste se promène à la campagne et visite une ferme. Il demande au paysan de lui faire visiter. Ensemble, ils vont vers l'étable. Le touriste va vers une vache et se met à lui parler : -... Un contadino è seduto sopra un pezzo di legno e arriva un signore vestito bene che gli chiede se può parlare con i suoi animali e il contadino gli dice di si anche se lui dice che non gli possono...
Englishman: "That your Dog"..??
Welshman: "Aye".
Englishman: "Mind if I Speak to him"..??
Welshman: "Dog don't Talk.”
Englishman: Hey Dog, how's it going"..??
Dog: "Doing All Right, Thanks".
Welshman: (Look of Shock).
Englishman: Is this your Owner"..?? (Pointing at the Welshman).
Dog: "Yep."
Englishman: How's He Treating You"..??
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the park once a week to play."
Welshman: (Look of Total Disbelief).
Englishman: "Mind if I Talk to your Horse"..??
Welshman: "Horse Don't Talk”.
Englishman: "Hey Horse how's it Going"..??
Horse: "Cool, Thanks".
Welshman: (Extreme Look of Shock).
Englishman: "Is this your Owner"..?? (Pointing to the Welshman).
Horse: "Yep."
Englishman: "How's He Treating You"..??
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he Rides me, Brushes me down often and keeps me in a nice Stable to protect me from the Weather."
Welshman: (Now a Look of Total Amazement).
Englishman: "Mind if I Talk to your Sheep"..??
Welshman: "That Sheep's a вlооdy Liar”..
Pet Jokes Horse jokes Welsh jokes