Chuck Norris

Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.

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Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.

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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.

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Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.

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Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.

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Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can punch a hole through thin air.

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Love is one way to get to a persons heart the other is Chuck Norris' fists.

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Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.

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Chuck norris can throw a rock at you... looking the other way.

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Bacons' favorite smell is Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris has his own protien powder.
The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.

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Chuck Norris beat the Hulk in an arm wreslting contest... with his leg.

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Chuck Norris decided 50 years of Micheal Jackson was enough

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When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris rejects your reality and substitutes it with his fist.

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Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.

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Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out.
No one dared to move.

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Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes.
Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

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