I met a popstar in a nightclub last night and we ended up getting really drunк and going back to my place.
She was all over me in the taxi, stroking and caressing my body and whispering filth into my ear,
But as soon as she got through the front door she stiffened up and her attitude changed completely.
“What the fuск is that pathetic little thing?” she demanded. “How the hеll do you think that you’re going to satisfy me with that?”
I’m sorry, Adele, I replied, it’s the biggest fridge I could afford.