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Animal Jokes

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Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
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What do you call a mouse that doesn’t like being known about-
Anonymouse
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Which roman emperor was a mouse? Julius cheeser!
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What is a pig cross pineapple.
A porkypine!
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The cat ran across the road when the car swerved it killed a bear that killed a dog that killed a squirrel that killed a nut, the cat survived it all, the cat killed the squirrel and the bear with the car…
The cat still died why?
It had a Catastrophic Catcident
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Q. What’s the best way to eat a squirrel
A. Open up its little legs
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One time there was a squirrel who died. It was funny because the squirrel got dead.
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What do you call a squirrel that flys? A flying squirrel.
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What do you call a squirrel with wings? A flying squirrel, it’s pretty self-explanatory.
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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says “I forgot to store acorns for winter so now I am dead” haha it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.
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What do squirrels eat? Nuts 🥜
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What did the squirrel say to the dog?
There are nuts in your роор. I found them.
:(
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How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.
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Why didn’t the squirrel wanna go swimming because he didnt wanna get his nuts wet
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What would you name a mumafied squirrel?
Perhaps… Mumford?
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Q. How do you catch a squirrel?
A. Act like a nut.
(Psst!Heard this joke before?Sorry!That’s the only nut-and-squirrel joke I know.)
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What do squirrels and men have in common?
They always want a nut.
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The other day a squirrel asked me for a job, I asked him what jobs did you have previously. Calmly he answered," I am a pilot, I can pick it up from here and pile it over there, I also can fly a sign!!!"
" To bad, this is a nut cannery, and we’re 100% automated, we don’t need anyone at this time, sorry."
" No worries, I’m totally nuts anyway, guess I’ll fly a sign across town, don’t have bus fare!!!"
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What did one squirrel say to the other ‘‘do you have any nuts’’
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You know I want an ADHD cure.
When?
Squirrel
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