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  3. One day this man was...
One day this man was driving for hours through the country side and needed to go to the bathroom urgently. He sees an old store off the side of the road, pulls up and proceeds to the bathroom.
When he was done dumping his captains log, he looked around and noticed to his shock there was no toilet paper and a sign on the wall - “Sorry, there is no toilet paper, but if you wipe your аrsе with your index and middle fingers and stick them in this hole they will be licked clean.”
The man thought to himself that that was nasty and that he was not going to do that.
So he sits for a further hour trying to figure out what to do, and eventually realizes that although its nasty, that he would do it.
So he wipes his аrsе with his fingers and sticks them in the hole. Then a man on the other side slams two bricks onto the mans fingers so hard the unbelievable pain causes him to shove his fingers in his mouth.
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