News & Politics

How are politicians like diapers?
You have to change them both often, and for the same reason.

Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.

- Give me your money!
- You know i'm a politician, right?
- Then give me my money!

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"
Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me capitalism.
Your Mom, she’s the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government.
We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you the people.
The nanny, we’ll consider her the Working Class.
And your baby brother, we’ll call him the Future.
Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said.
Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him.
He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper.
So the little boy goes to his parents’ room and finds his mother sound asleep.
Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny’s room.
Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny.
He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I Understand the concept of politics now."
The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."
The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."

Ignorance + Religion = Terrorism.
Ignorance + Power = Tyranny
Ignorance + Freedom = Chaos
Ignorance + Money = Corruption
Ignorance + Poverty = Crime

Ignorance is the root of all evil

if the opposite of "Pro" is "Con", then what is the opposite of "Progress"?

if the opposite of "Pro" is "Con", then what is the opposite of "Progress"?

What's the secret to a the long and healthy life?

What's the secret to a the long and healthy life?

It’s so cold I saw a socialists with his hands in his own pockets.

Тold my son, “You will marry the girl I choose.”
He said, “NO!”
I told him, “She is Bill Gates’ daughter.”
He said, “OK.”
I called Bill Gates and said, “I want your daughter to marry my son.” Bill Gates said, “NO.”
I told Bill Gates, My son is the CEO of World Bank.”
Bill Gates said, “OK.”
I called the President of World Bank and asked him to make my son the CEO.
He said, “NO.”
I told him, “My son is Bill Gates’ son-in-law.”
He said, “OK.”
This is exactly how politics works . . .

How the FBI unlocked that iPhone

How the FBI unlocked that iPhone

What will you have for thanksgiving dinner?
Turkey

What will you have for thanksgiving dinner?
Turkey