; ; ; A mother said to her son, "Look at that kid over there; he's not misbehaving." The son replied, "Maybe he has good parents then!" ; ;

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

A mother said to her son, "Look at that kid over there; he's not misbehaving."
The son replied,
"Maybe he has good parents then!"

A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."The teacher paused and said,
"But no one knows what God looks like."Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

Usually when kids go to sleep they sleep with a teddy bear...
Chuck Norris sleeps with an actual bear

A grandmother was pushing her little grandchild around Wal- Mart in a buggy.
Each time she put something in the basket she would say, "And here’s something for you, Diploma." or "This will make a cute little outfit for you, Diploma." and so on.
Eventually a bewildered shopper who’d heard all this finally asked,
"Why do you keep calling your grandchild Diploma?"
The grandmother replied, "I sent my daughter to the University of Virginia and this is what she came home with!"

How should you treat a baby goat?
Like a kid.

Wilfred had just learned his abc's and was very scared of doing them in front of the class.
The teacher, though, told him that the best way to conquer his fears would be to just go ahead and do it.
So, trembling, he stood in front of the class and began.
"Abcdefghijlkmnoqrstuvwxyz."
"Very good, Wilfred. But you forgot the P. Where's the P?
"It's running down my leg."

A girl asks her father, " Why does it rain? Is it God sweating or crying?"
" No," says her father, " it rains to make the plants grow. Do you understand?"
" Not exactly," says the girl. " Why does it rain on the sidewalk?"

Bob asks his grandmother:
"Granny, tell us, how my sister and me came to life?"
"Your sister, Bob, came from heaven and a stork has brought you to us."
Bob then, turns to his sister and whispers:
"Should we tell her the truth, or should we let her die without knowing…"

I'm staying at her mothers house, and she said, it's only 8:30 pm and everyone's already ready for bed.
My niece chimes in and says,
"Not me.", to which i respond, "You don't count."
Without missing a beat, she said,
"Yes i do. One, two, three, four."

What did the red light say to the green light?
Don't look I'm changing!

At the New York Zoo, a little boy felt the urge to feed his banana to a big gorilla there.
His mother didn’t allow it.
The boy started to cry, and made his mother to change her mind.
Proudly, the boy goes near the gorilla with the banana and as he was about to give it away, the gorilla grabbed him and was prepared to eat him.
Crying and shouting, the boy tries to escape, but even his mother stood still in the sight of it.
Suddenly, something sounded like a hum up in the air... It was Superman!
Superman rescued the child!
The crowd relieved applauses.
The Media arrived at that point, and the reporters started interviewing Superman.
"Which newspaper are you from?" Superman asked to one of them.
"New York Times."
"You can ask me now." Superman said.
"Were you scared while saving the kid?"
"Yes, but it doesn’t matter to me. I want to help other human beings, no matter the cost."
To the next reporter:
"Which newspaper are you from?
"Herald Tribute. Which are your beliefs about children?"
"I believe that children are the future of our world and that we should, all of us protect them from evil."
The third reporter:
"Which newspaper are you from?"
"Risebroker"
(Rizospastis, a Greek newspaper)
"To you, you damned communist, I’m not saying a word!"
Next Day, Newspapers write in their FrontPage:
New York Times – Superman, the abnegation and human sacrifice standard!
Herald Tribute – Superman, the defender and children Savior!
Risebroker – Superman, Propagandist, right winged fascist, deprives food from South-African immigrant!

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