Animal Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat.
He came across two men.
One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter.
The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.

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Men jokes Animal Jokes

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on top of a cliff.
A magical bird flies to them and tells them that each one of them can jump off the cliff and wish to be one thing to fly away on.
They will become that thing and can escape from their arduous situation.
The redhead goes first.
She jumps and says "eagle!".
She turns into an eagle and flies away.
The brunette jumps off and says,"hawk!" she turns into a hawk and flies away.
The blonde takes a running start, trips on a rock as she nears the edge. "Oh сrар!" she yells.

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Blonde Jokes Animal Jokes

What would you do if your were in a large room, all sealed up, no windows, the door was locked, and there were 5 hungry tigers, 32 vultures, 17 spitting cobras, 213 tarantulas, 1 laywer, and you had a gun with only two bullets?
Shoot the lawyer twice.

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Animal Jokes Lawyer Jokes

Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes Cowboys and Indians Jokes

What's a rabbits favourite car?
Any make, just as long it's a hutchback.

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Animal Jokes Car and driving jokes

What is a moo hoo for a соw that fell into the thresher?
Ground round.

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Animal Jokes

What do you get if you cross a bottle of water with an electric eel?
A bit of a shock really.

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Animal Jokes

What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other?
Isaiah.

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Animal Jokes

Which rabbit was in Western movies?
Hopalong Cassidy.

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Animal Jokes

Why did the rabbit have trouble hopping?
Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck.

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Animal Jokes

What animal do you look like when you get into the bath?
A little bear.

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Animal Jokes

Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing?
He was always standing up on the job!

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Animal Jokes Office and Work Jokes

Why are cows made for dancing?
They re all born hoofers.

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Animal Jokes

What does a соw like to do by a campfire?
Roast Moosmallows.

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Animal Jokes

What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?
He stank to the bottom of the pool.

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Animal Jokes

Why did the jellyfish's wife leave him?
He stung her into action.

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Animal Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes

Q: What do you call a nакеd deer?
A: Buck nакеd!

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Animal Jokes

What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house?
The Lizard of Oz.

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Animal Jokes

What do you call explosive соw vомiт?
A cud missle.

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Animal Jokes

What's the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper !

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Animal Jokes