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Animal Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
What is the best advice to give a worm?
Sleep late.
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Animal Jokes
Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette?
He didn't have enough money tabaccer!
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Money jokes Animal Jokes Men jokes
What's an octopuses favourite latin saying?
Squid pro quo.
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Animal Jokes
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
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Animal Jokes
First Kangaroo: What do you call it when giraffes moving one way get mixed up with giraffes moving another way?
Second Kangaroo: A giraffic jam.
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Animal Jokes
What did one dairy соw say to another?
Got milk?
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Animal Jokes Food Jokes
What do you call a tired соw?
Milked out.
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Animal Jokes
What do you call someone who sticks his right hand in shark's mouths?
Lefty.
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Animal Jokes
What's the definition of a nervous breakdown?
A chameleon on a tartan rug.
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Animal Jokes
Why is the old, worn out horse named Flattery?
Because it gets you nowhere.
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Animal Jokes
Lion wakes up in the jungle and finds that a тооl is missing, he goes to elephant and asks "Have you seen my тооl?"
Elephant replies:
"What does it look like?"
Lion:
"Well it's got four points on it."
Elephant:
"Sorry, I haven't seen it, try mouse."
So the Lion goes to the mouse and asks "Have you seen my тооl?"
Mouse:
"What does it look like?"
Lion:
"Well it's got four points on it."
Mouse:
"Sorry mate, I've not seen it, try croc."
So the lion proceeds to the crocodile and asks "Have you seen my тооl?"
Croc:
"What does it look like?"
Lion:
"Well it's got four points on it."
Croc:
"Sorry I've not seen it, try Jaguar."
So the lion goes to Jaguar and asks "Have you seen my тооl?"
Jaguar:
"Of course, I ate it."
Lion:
"Why did you do that?"
Jaguar:
"Well I'm a four point тооl eater Jaguar."
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Animal Jokes
What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a соw?
Cowboom!
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Animal Jokes
What do you call a fish with no eye? FSH
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Animal Jokes
What kind of sharks make good carpenters?
Hammerheads.
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Animal Jokes
What did the calf say to the silo?
"Is my fodder in there?"
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Animal Jokes
Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they are black and white.
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Animal Jokes
Yo' Mama is like a donkey: everybody rides the аss.
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Yo Momma Jokes Animal Jokes
Yo' Mama is so poor, she steals her breakfast from backyard bird feeders.
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Yo Momma Jokes Money jokes Animal Jokes
Q: Why do dogs liск their ваlls?
A: Because they can.
Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches?
A: Same reason.
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Gross Jokes Jokes about Women Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Dog jokes
What do spiders like to order at a fast food restaurant?
Burgers and flies.
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Gross Jokes Food Jokes Animal Jokes Restaurant Jokes
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