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Мъже-Жени Men vs Women Jokes Kampf der Geschlechter Hombres y Mujeres Анекдоты про Мужа и Жену Blagues Hommes vs Femmes Barzellette su Uomini e Donne Ανέκδοτα για γυναίκες και άντρες Вицеви за Он и Она Kadın Erkek Fıkraları Анекдоти про Жінок і Чоловіків Homens e Mulheres Mężczyźni i Kobiety Män och Kvinnor Mannen en vrouwen moppen Mænd – Kvinder-vittigheder Han og henne Miehet ja Naiset Férfiak és Nők Bancuri cu bărbați și femei Muži a ženy Anekdotai apie vyrus ir moteris Vīrieši un Sievietes Muškarci i Žene
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Men vs Women Jokes

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A pilot was forced to make a crash landing in a farmer's field.
The farmer took the pilot back to the farmhouse, where the pilot noticed the farmer had a golden fiddle hanging above the fireplace. The two men were standing there talking when the farmer's wife came down the steps. The pilot couldn't believe how beautiful she was.
"How can you trust her to be here by herself all day, while you go out and work the fields?"
"I trust my wife," the farmer said. "She's never been unfaithful."
"I'll make you a little bet. If I take your wife upstairs, she'll be unfaithful. If not, you can have my plane. But, if she is, I get your fiddle."
"It's a deal." So, the pilot and the farmer's wife go upstairs. About a half hour passes, and the farmer picks up the fiddle and starts playing it.
"Be true to me, Be true to me, Be true for just one hour. Be true to me, Be true to me, And his airplane will be ours." Another fifteen minutes pass, and suddenly he sees his wife coming down the stairs. He asks her if she stayed true to him. She walked over, picked up the fiddle, started playing it.
"He kissed me on the lips, He kissed me on the тiтs, He kissed me in the middle. He kissed a spot that you forgot, and you lost your fuскing fiddle."
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Men vs Women Jokes Pilot Jokes Aviation Jokes Boob Jokes
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead go camping for the weekend.
The brunette brings food so they can eat, the red head brings water so they can drink and the blonde brings a car door, so if she gets hot she can roll down a window.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
What is the difference between a GOOD and a BAD girl?
A GOOD girl goes to a party, goes home then goes to bed. A BAD girl goes to a party, goes to bed then goes home.
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Men vs Women Jokes
An old man finds a соndом in his grandson's apartment and asks what it is.
"It's a соndом," replies the grandson, sheepishly.
"What do you use it for?" asks Grandpa.
The grandson is embarrassed, so he says, "I use it to keep my cigarettes dry when I smoke in the rain."
Grandpa says, "That's a great idea." He goes to the drug store and asks the pharmacist for a соndом.
"What size would you like?" asks the pharmacist.
"Big enough to fit a Camel."
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Men vs Women Jokes
Harry and his wife are driving in the country when he sees a sign that reads: "Соw For Sale - $5,000."
He pulls in and says to the farmer, "There's no соw in the world worth$5,000." The farmer says, "Oh, yeah? Take a look at this." He lifts the соw's tail and Harry sees that the соw has a snатсh just like a woman. Harry gets back in the car, turns to his wife and says, "It's just not fair. Here's this farmer with a соw that has a snатсh like a woman and it's worth $5,000, and here I am, with you, with a snатсh like a соw, and you're not worth sh*t."
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Men vs Women Jokes
Two drunк guys try to pick up some girls. Two girls go home with drunк guys home, slip вlоw-up dolls into their beds and leave.
The next morning, one guy tells the other, "I think my girl was a witch! When I bit her on the тiт, she hissed and flew away."
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Men vs Women Jokes
A woman goes to the gynecologist for an exam. She puts her feet into the stirrups and the doctor begins his exam.
After a moment, he says, "You have an unusually deep vаginа."
The woman replies, "You don't have to say it twice."
The doctor says, "I didn't."
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- Охо-о-о - каза гинекологът. На гинеколог A woman goes to her gynecologist. He examines her and says, "What a hole! What a hole!" And she says "You didn't have to say it twice!" And he says "I didn't, it was an echo." — Ого! Un gynécologue examine une patiente et lui dit : C'est une femme qui consulte son gynéco: - Docteur, mon mari me dit que mon sexe est trop grand, enfin trop large quoi... - Déshabillez-vous, je vais vous donner mon avis. La femme se déshabille et se met sur la table d'auscultation. Et là le docteur crie: - Quelle chatte immense!! Quelle chatte... Σαραντάρα Una signora va dal ginecologo Ginecologo: "Ok signora, ora apre le gambe" Dopo averle aperte il ginecologo le fa: "Vedo che lei ha una vagina molto grande.. Vedo che lei ha una vagina molto grande"... Aquela senhora tinha uma vagina enorme e sempre se sentia constrangida quando tinha de ir ao ginecologista, por isso resolveu mudar de médico. — Pode tirar a roupa e deitar-se ali — disse o novo... - Ojojoj (powiedział ginekolog) - Ojojoj jojoj jojoj (odpowiedziało echo)
Men vs Women Jokes Gynecology Jokes
Why did the gynecologist go to the eye doctor?
Because things were looking a little fuzzy.
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Men vs Women Jokes Gynecology Jokes
Q: Why did the blonde run out of shampoo so fast?
A: She kept following the instructions: lather, rinse, repeat!
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
Q: What two men's hobbies require the most hand-eye coordination?
A: Video games and роrn.
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Men vs Women Jokes
Did you hear that Bill Gates bought the rights to Viаgrа?
He's renaming it Microhard.
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Men vs Women Jokes Viagra jokes
Q: What did the вrа say to the hat?
A: "You go on ahead while I give these two a lift."
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Men vs Women Jokes One-Liner Jokes
A man walking down the street trips over an old oil lamp. As he picks it up, a genie pops out and says, "I will grant you one wish."
The man says, "I want to live in a mansion in Hawaii, but I'm afraid of boats and planes, so I want there to be a bridge from here to there."
The genie sighs. "That's too much work. Sorry, can't make it happen."
The man says, "Fine, then I want to understand women."
The genie replies, "Would you like two lanes or four on that bridge?"
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One day a man was walking along the beach and found a bottle. He looked around and didn't see anyone so he opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie. While walking along a beach, a man finds a lamp and rubs it off. A genie appears and offers to grant the man one wish. A man was strolling along a beach in California. A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, "Lord, grant me one wish." Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man... Der Geist in der Flasche À Brest, un retraité est en train de biner son jardin lorsqu'il tombe sur une vieille lampe à huile, comme celle d'Aladdin. En man är ute och promenerar på en strand i Kalifornien och funderar över livet när han helt plötsligt utbrister: - "Herre, uppfyll en önskan åt mig!" Plötsligt fylls himlen av mörka moln över hans huvud och han hör Gud säga med mörk röst: -... Een man wandelde op het strand en was in diep gebed verzonken. Plots zei hij luidop: "God, laat me één wens doen". De lucht brak open boven zijn hoofd en de luide stem van God riep: "Omdat jij mij... Mies kulki yksinään rannalla ja löysi pullon lojumassa hiekassa. Hän kurkottui poimimaan pullon ja veti korkin ulos. Savupilven keskeltä tuli esiin henki. Henki kiitti nopeasti miestä vapaudestaan...
Men vs Women Jokes
What is six inches long with a head on it, that women like to вlоw?
MONEY.
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Jokes about Women Money jokes Men vs Women Jokes
Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police?
A: Her headlights weren't working, so she was flashing people.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
How do you stop a dog who's huмрing your leg?
Whack him off!
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Men vs Women Jokes Dog jokes
Two women, one from the north and one from the south, are seated next to one another on a plane.
"Where you flyin' to?" says the southern woman. The northern woman turns up her nose.
"Don't you know you should NEVER end a sentence with a preposition?" The southern woman thinks about this for a second.
"Where you flyin' to, вiтсh?"
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Men vs Women Jokes
Q: Why was the 6'6" guy so brokenhearted after his 4'9" girlfriend dumped him?
A: He was nuts over her.
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Men vs Women Jokes
Q: Why does a man's реnis have a hole in it?
A: So he can get oxygen to his brain.
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Men vs Women Jokes
How do you keep a blonde at home?
Build a circular driveway.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
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