Military Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

I typed "married" but it was auto-corrected to "martyred". Dамn,smartphone has gained intelligence.

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Marriage and Family Jokes Military Jokes

We just got a fax. At work. We didn't know we had a fax machine. The entire department just stared at it. I poked it with a stick.

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Office and Work Jokes Military Jokes

When they said joining the army was like the movies, I didn't think they meant Brokeback Mountain

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Dirty jokes Military Jokes

A guy went to the beach to lay down and relax and had a newspaper covering his private parts but then a little girl came up to him and said what is under the newspaper and the guy said, my birdie don't touch it and then the guy went to sleep and soon after he woke up he found out that he was in the hospital and his private parts were hurting an then he saw the little girl right next to him and asked what happened and the little girl said when you were asleep I played with your birdie and then it spat on me so I broke the neck, busted the eggs, and burned its nest.

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Dirty jokes Military Jokes

This must be the 8th castle because I just found my princess.

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Military Jokes

I'm pretty sure I'm going to die without knowing what 95% of a scientific calculator is used for.

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Military Jokes

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.

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Military Jokes

Dates a zombie: so someone finally likes me for my brain.

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Military Jokes

A rolling stone... somebody pushed it.

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Military Jokes

Intelligence is like an underwear. It is important that you have it, but not necessary that you show it off.

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Military Jokes

If I was smarter, I would know so much more stuff.

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Military Jokes

I heard you were good at algebra. Can you replace my X without asking y?

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Military Jokes

Why do I always know where to go when I am canoeing? Because I "canoe" it.

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Military Jokes

A 'Jim's Dozen' is 11, because I take one for myself.

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Military Jokes

Do you have 11 protons? Cause your sodium fine.

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Military Jokes

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

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Military Jokes

A flight attendant for a major airline, watched one day as a passenger overloaded with bags tried to stuff his belongings in the overhead bin of the plane.
Finally, she informed him that he would have to check the over-sized luggage. "When I fly other airlines," he said irritably, "I don't have this problem."
The flight attendant smiled, "When you fly other airlines, I don't have this problem either."

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Aviation Jokes Military Jokes

Just heard on the radio that apparently Colonel Sanders got the idea for KFC during WWI when he was raiding a German chicken farm using a flame thrower.

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Food Jokes Military Jokes

I shot a man with a paintball gun just to watch him dye.

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Military Jokes

“Sanderson, fire a warning shot.”
“Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher.”
“Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger.”

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Military Jokes