Nationality - Page 10

I just got back from another country. Just got back from the south Bronx. Dogs bark in Spanish over there.

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Nationality Jokes

So, it's National Coming Out Day. I'm walking through Dallas/Fort Worth airport. I got my National Coming Out Day t-shirt on 'cause I'm proud -- got a sweatshirt on over that 'cause I'm smart.

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Nationality Jokes Dirty jokes

Thank god a Scottish horse won the Grand National !!
Or Sturgeon would have asked for a вlооdy Re-Run

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Nationality Jokes God Jokes Political Jokes

One day while I was in Italy, I visited some old Roman ruins, and for no reason I could figure out, these ruins had a maintenance department. How do you maintain a ruins? What, does a foreman come in at nine o'clock and go, 'Fellas, leave it the way it is. I'm going to take the rest of the day off.'

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Nationality Jokes

I'll take anybody's day off to party. I'm serious -- I'll take David Duke Day off.

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Nationality Jokes

I was opening a show for Huey Lewis once, right? We get to this venue; the last big act that was there before the Huey Lewis show was Clint Black. We get downstairs to the dressing room -- sure enough, on one of the dressing room doors there is a sign that says 'Clint Black.' And I'm thinking, 'Is that my name and a brief description?'

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Nationality Jokes

Granddaughter: It’s March 14th grandpa, national “pi” day.
Grandpa: I love pie!
Granddaughter: Not that kind of pie grandpa, I’m talking about a formula!
Grandpa: Back in my day we called it a recipe!
Granddaughter: Graaaand Paaaa, not that, it’s a mathematical formula, you know an equation.
Grandpa: That’s the problem these days, everyone makes things so complicated. In my day we used things like cups, teaspoons and tablespoons. We didn’t need math if we wanted to bake a pie.
Granddaughter: Oh, I see your point! So what would you like, apple or cherry pie?
Grandpa: Finally, a young person who actually understand things.

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Nationality Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Math Jokes

No matter what the issue is, he has the pat African American answer. He's like the black See and Say, just pull the string:
'The cops were murderers.'
'O. J. was innocent.'
'I like "Moesha."'

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Nationality Jokes

Juan Valdez names his mule after you. You chew on your roommate's fingernails. You can jump-start your car without cables. You do twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in. You can't remember your second cup. You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug. Starbucks has a mortgage on your house. Your birthday is a national holiday in Columbia. You don't sweat - you percolate. You grind coffee beans in your mouth.

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Nationality Jokes

Total UK National Debt …. £1.3 trillion.
Total number of people in the UK unemployed …. 6.3 million
Cost of hosting London 2012 per UK taxpayer …. £550
Watching Mr Bean play the Piano …. Priceless

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Sports Jokes Nationality Jokes

Latin women will start moving 30 seconds before there's music. It's like a cat before an earthquake, man -- 'Hang on, there's music coming, I know there is, waiting a second -- there it is!'

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Jokes about Women Nationality Jokes Men jokes

A man went to get the results of his illness from the doctor..
“I’m afraid you have Yellow 42 - a disease so rare it doesn’t even have a proper name.
Bad news is.. you only have six months to live…”
The man goes home and tells his wife.
After the crying, she vows to spend more time together for the final few months together - starting tonight at the bingo hall.
So they both go down to Gala Bingo Hall. In the entrance way he puts a pound in the slot machine.. and wins £200.
He plays bingo and wins every line, corner and full house.
He then plays the national link and wins £20000.
Upon receiving the money the MC says “you must be the luckiest man alive.
You win £200, all the bingo money and £20k national.”
The man says “I have Yellow 42”
“Fuск me” says the MC, “you’ve won the frickin’ raffle as well”

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News and Politics Jokes Nationality Jokes Money jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Men jokes Sick and Death Jokes

My doctor said that I should watch what I eat so I’ve decided to go to the Grand-National!

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Nationality Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Animal Jokes

How can you not love the Spanglish? I love it -- twice the vocabulary, half the grammar.

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Nationality Jokes

Not only am I a New Yorker, but I'm also a Jew, so there's like a chance in Неll I'll ever be happy.

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Nationality Jokes

I'm actually from the Caribbean island St. Lucia, and the thing is, growing up there, it was like all black people, man. I spent most of my life thinking that a racist was just a very fast person.

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Nationality Jokes Men jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes

A three-fer:
What do you get when you cross a former vice president with a slasher film?
An Al Gore-fest!
What do you get when you cross a former "90210" actress with a national youth contest?
A Tori Spelling-Bee!
What do you get when you cross a presidential candidate with a wind instrument?
A Donald Trump-pet!

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Nationality Jokes

I've always tried to be a good American citizen, so I have made it a point not to learn any other language but English.

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Nationality Jokes

Mexicans work hard, brother. They work harder than everybody. Mexican's have the strongest work ethic on earth. If Mexicans had been slaves, slavery would've been over real quick because they'd have done 300 hours of work in about nine hours and still have time for a soccer game.

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Office and Work Jokes Nationality Jokes

I'm English, but I want to let you know that even though I'm English, I'm not here to solve a мurdеr mystery.

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Nationality Jokes