If Operating Systems Were Airlines
DOS Air: Passengers walk out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane,
Push it until it gets in the air, hop on, then jump off when it hits
The ground. They grab the plane again, push it back into the air, hop
On, jump off...
Mac Airways: The cashiers, flight attendants, and pilots all look the
Same, talk the same, and act the same. When you ask them questions
About the flight, they reply that you don't want to know, don't need
To know, and would you please return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines: The terminal is neat and clean, the attendants
Courteous, the pilots capable. The fleet of Lear jets the carrier
Operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushes above
The clouds and, at 20,000 feet, explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways: The terminal is almost empty - only a few prospective
Passengers mill about. The announcer says that a flight has just
Departed, although no planes appear to be on the runway. Airline
Personnel apologize profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing
From time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside. They tell each
Passenger how great the flight will be on these new jets and how much
Safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but they will have to wait a
Little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe
Until mid-2005. Maybe longer
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release (by Mr. Welch himself) stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason at all, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left-turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, and you would have to reinstall the engine.
4. When your car died on the freeway for no reason, you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought 'Car95' or 'CarNT', and then added more seats.
6. Apple would make a car powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would run on only five per cent of the roads.
7. Oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single 'general car default' warning light.
8. New seats would force every-one to have the same size вuтт.
9. The airbag would say 'Are you sure?' before going off.
10. Occasionally, for no reason, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of road maps from Rand-McNally (a subsidiary of GM), even though they neither need them nor want them. Trying to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50 per cent or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You would press the 'start' button to shut off the engine.