I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. I...

I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.
The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.
The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.
I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

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