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Latest Jokes

What did the реnis say to the vаginа?
Don't make me сuм in there.

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Vagina Jokes

What do homosexuals and mice have in common?
They both hate рussy!

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Vagina Jokes

No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris wears sunglasses not to protect his eyes from the sun, but to protect the sun from Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris watched the entire Lord of the Rings without blinking.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't fall, he merely tests the durability of the floor with his face.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes

Dragons watch a movie called 'How to train your Chuck Norris.'

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Chuck Norris Jokes

An Irishman is really, really drunк, so the bar keeper walks up to him and says:
"Right, you've had enough, go home..."
So the irishman gets up off his stool and falls flat on his face, so he says:
"Ok, ai'll crawl outside instead, to sober up a bit more"
He gets outside, and falls flat on his face, so instead he crawls the four streets to his home.
When he gets home he opens the door, standing, and yet again falls flat on his face.
So he crawls upstairs into his room, stands up and falls flat on his bed and falls fast asleep straight away.
The following morning his wife wakes him up and says, 'You've been drinking again haven't you?'
The Irishman replies, 'What makes you say that?'
His wife replies, 'Well the pub just called, you've left your wheelchair there again!'

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Marriage and Family Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes

Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says,
"Two seconds 'till."
After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Dante's Inferno is based on a Nature Walk Chuck Norris once took.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Barbwire wants a tatoo of Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead go on holiday to a tropical island.
The brunette takes a beach umbrella, the redhead takes a crate of suntan oil, and the blonde takes a car door.
‘What are you doing with a car door?’ asks the redhead.
The blonde replies, ‘If it gets too hot, we can roll the window down.’

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Blonde Jokes

More than anything, Bob wanted to be a cowpoke.
Taking pity on him, a rancher decided to hire the lad and give him a chance.
"This," he said, showing him a rope, "is a lariat. We use it to catch cows."
"I see," said Bob, trying to seem knowledgeable as he examined the lariat. "And what do you use for bait?"

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Animal Jokes

Q. What do frogs do with paper?
A. Rip-it!

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Animal Jokes

What does an octopus take on a camping trip?
Tentacles.

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Animal Jokes

The climate requires Chuck's permission to change.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Weather jokes

Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?

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Banker Jokes Lawyer Jokes