Attitude Jokes

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Remember, it's not what you do... it's what you get away with.

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Attitude Jokes

Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

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Attitude Jokes

I hugged someone once and they expected it every time they saw me. I'll never do that again.

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Attitude Jokes

Tarzan doesn't have a beard. Yet he lives in the jungle for over 30 years.

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Attitude Jokes

Why is it everything I love is either unhealthy, addicting or has multiple restraining orders against me?

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Attitude Jokes

I've had so much to drink that you're beginning to look good.

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Attitude Jokes

Before I buy a leaf blower I want to make sure I understand the rules. We just вlоw the leaves at each other's houses, right?

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Attitude Jokes

Why is the day that you do laundry, cook, clean, iron and so on, called a day off?

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Attitude Jokes

Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.

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Attitude Jokes

It's funny how one person can make you never trust anybody...

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Attitude Jokes

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

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Attitude Jokes

The same people who laugh at gypsy fortune tellers take economists seriously.

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Attitude Jokes

I don't want you to feel like you can't express yourself, but I do want you to stop talking.

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Attitude Jokes

Why do people ask me if I'm "hiding", if I was hiding you wouldn't see me!

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Attitude Jokes

If you feel unsure about a new haircut, ask a man if it looks okay. But ask him many, many, many times. Never be satisfied with his answer.

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Men jokes Attitude Jokes

Finally I got laid on top of a how woman, I was on the upper berth and she on the lower one.

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Jokes about Women Attitude Jokes

A man's idea of serious commitment is usually, "Oh alright, I'll stay the night."

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Men jokes Attitude Jokes

I don't date older women because it takes too long to listen to their life story.

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Jokes about Women Attitude Jokes

I return to work tomorrow with a child-like belief that 2017 is the year people will think at least twice before hitting Reply All.

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Office and Work Jokes Attitude Jokes

Always give 100% at work: 12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday.

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Office and Work Jokes Attitude Jokes