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Birthday Jokes

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My friend had a German themed birthday party.
It was boring.
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Birthday Jokes
I went to my friend Ahkmed’s birthday party
Let’s just say the pass the parcel got out of hand
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Birthday Jokes
I'll be celebrating my birthday next month, but just for half a minute.
It's my thirty second birthday after all
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Birthday Jokes
It's my wife's birthday so I've bought her the current must have present, took ages to find and even then had to fight to get it.
A 9 pack of toilet roll.
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Birthday Jokes
It's my wife's birthday next week and I've managed to get her this year's must haves!
A 4-pack of toilet roll and a bag of Fusilli! She is going to be thrilled!
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Birthday Jokes
What do you call the kids who are invited to Michael Jackson's birthday party?
Presents
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Birthday Jokes
What's the WORST thing you could give to a professional athlete??
A Birthday Card!
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Birthday Jokes
What did one nun say to the other on her birthday?
Let's celibate!
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Birthday Jokes
A pair of twins were in a cake shop...
They were looking for a birthday cake but just couldn’t decide on a topping.
Twin 1:
“I want chocolate”
Twin 2:
“I want skittles”
Twin 1:
“How about we do Rock Paper Scissors?”
Twin 2:
“Why would I want that on my cake?”
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Birthday Jokes
What did one terrorist say to another terrorist on his birthday?
I hope you have a blast today
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Birthday Jokes
Where do you take an amish kid for their birthday party?
Build-A-Barn
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Birthday Jokes
I hand my father his 50th birthday card...
He said "You know, one would've been enough..."
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Birthday Jokes
I know every joke there is! I'll guess what joke was made on your birthday!
You.
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Birthday Jokes
I am an anti-vax kid and tomorrow's my 18th birthday.
This is the correct subreddit to post it yeah.
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Birthday Jokes
My dad's eyes filled with tears when I handed him his 80th birthday card
He looked at me and said "you know, one would've been enough"
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Birthday Jokes
On my birthday my girlfriend decided to wake me up with an оrаl.
Nearly suffocated.
Credit: Jimmy Carr
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Birthday Jokes
So I went to an Antivax kids 3rd birthday.
I don’t know why everyone is wearing black and crying tho.
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Birthday Jokes
My favorite gift to give is uncertainty
Or is it?
Happy birthday.
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Birthday Jokes
What does a man who has everything get his wife for her birthday?
A birthday card.
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Birthday Jokes
Stephen Hawking asked Albert Einstein "What do you want for your birthday?". He responded,
"You.".
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Birthday Jokes
What did the milennial say at his birthday?
Yo, these candles are LIT!
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Birthday Jokes
After I had my colonoscopy, the proctologist asked if I had any questions.
Apparently "Do you do birthday parties?" was the wrong answer.
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Birthday Jokes
Birthday's are like speed [OC]
It's not how much you have that kills you, it's the sudden lack of having it.
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Birthday Jokes
My doctor sang this to me at my birthday
"Happy birthday to you. You live in a zoo. You have terminal cancer. Your family'll miss you"
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Birthday Jokes
I got my drug dealer arrested the other day
Maybe next time you'll wish me happy birthday, mom
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Birthday Jokes
What did the kid with Down syndrome get on his birthday?
An extra chromosome.
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Birthday Jokes
Why did the student go to the sтriр club on his 18th birthday?
He wanted to study a broad
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Birthday Jokes
On my birthday, my wife asked me to take her some where she never visited...
On my birthday, my wife asked me to take her some where she never visited. So I took her to the kitchen :P
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Birthday Jokes
A local candle shop burned down...
It didnt help that everyone stood outside and sang happy birthday
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Birthday Jokes
He says to his wife:
"Sleeping with you is like Christmas, Birthday and the 4th of July in a single moment."
To which she replies:
"Well, each of those dates is just once per year too."
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Christmas Jokes Birthday Jokes
My parents surprised me with a car for my eigtheenth birthday.
Luckily I dodged it.
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Birthday Jokes
Ok, I will stop making fun about your age. Making fun of old people is not funny.
Happy Birthday!
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Birthday Jokes
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