Corny Jokes

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A moth visits a doctor, “Doctor please help me… I cut myself very badly 2 hours ago.”
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The doctor takes a look and says, “Goodness me, that looks bad! Why didn’t you come earlier?”
The moth says, “I waited for the lights to turn on in your office …”

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Corny Jokes

2 mosquitos are about to suск a sleeping man. Suddenly one of them says to the other:
“Hang on, something flew in my eye.”

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Corny Jokes

What sits up a tree and goes "aaaaaah"? An owl with a speech impediment.

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Corny Jokes

Question: Why is it so much fun to ride a train with a teacher?
Answer: He says spit out the gum and the train goes chew chew.

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Corny Jokes School Jokes

Woman calls the police:
“Is it the police I'm with.”
Police officer:
“If you are with the police why would you call here?”

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Corny Jokes Police Officer Jokes

Who’s there?
The love of your life.
Liar! Chocolate can’t speak!

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Corny Jokes

A detective asks a woman, "So, your husband hanged himself?"
Woman replies, "Yes, that is correct."
The suspicious detective continues, "But why does he have all those bruises on his head?"
"The old fool used an elastic rope!"

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Corny Jokes

Question: I have an extra-large nose, three eyes and thirty teeth. What am I?
Answer: Ugly

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Corny Jokes

I’m certain there are female hormones in вееr. When I drink too much, I talk nonsense and I cannot control my car.

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Corny Jokes Beer Jokes

A man noticed his credit card has been stolen - but he never reported it because the thief was still spending considerably less than his wife. What is yellow and can’t swim?
An excavator.
Did you find it funny?
No.
Neither did the excavator operator.

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Corny Jokes

My girlfriend says that I am snoopy. But OK, maybe she meant it differently when she wrote it in her diary.
Waiter, I am outraged. There is one hair in my soup.
And what do you expect for this price? A whole wig?!

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Corny Jokes

Where do baby cats learn to swim?
The kitty pool.

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Corny Jokes

Why did the bicycle collapse?
It was two tired.

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Corny Jokes

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they’d be called bagels.

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Corny Jokes

How does a boar sign its name?
With a pig pen.

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Corny Jokes

Why did the poor man stock up on yeast?
To make some dough.

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Corny Jokes

What did the big flower say to the little flower?
"Hey there, bud."

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Corny Jokes

How does a rancher keep track of his cattle?
With a соw-culator.

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Corny Jokes

Why was the robot so tired after his road trip?
He had a hard drive.

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Corny Jokes

Why should you never use "beef stew" as a password?
It’s not stroganoff.

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Corny Jokes

Why is the mushroom always invited to parties?
He's a fungi.

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Corny Jokes

When do computers overheat?
When they need to vent.

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Corny Jokes

What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her?
"Namaste."

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Corny Jokes

What do you call birds that stick together?
Vel-crows.

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Corny Jokes

Why didn't the skeleton get a prom date?
He didn't have the guts to ask anyone.

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Corny Jokes