Baseball jokes

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Manager: Our new infielder cost $10 million. I call him our “Wonder Player.”… Every time he plays, I wonder why I bothered to get him.

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Why does a pitcher raise one leg when he throws the ball?
If he raised them both, he’d fall down.

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Where do they keep the largest diamond in NYC?
Yankee Stadium

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Why did the Braves hire a baker?
They needed a new batter.

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When should baseball players wear armor?
When they’re playing knight games.

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What did the baseball glove say to the ball?
Catch ya later!

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Where do catchers sit at lunch?
Behind the plate.

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Why is Yankee Stadium the coolest place to be?
It’s full of fans

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Did you hear? Detroit is building a new stadium at an undisclosed location.
They’re keeping it a secret because they’re afraid the Tigers might find out and try to play there.

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What are the rules for zebra baseball?
Three stripes and you’re out.

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An apartment building is on fire and people are at the window, screaming for help.
“Just jump out the window,” a man yells. “I’m a baseball player. I can catch you.”
One smart resident decided to get more information, first.
“Wait,” he said. “What team do you play for?”
“The Cincinnati Reds,” shouts the man.
“Ehhhh,” shrugs the resident. “I’ll take my chances with the fire.”

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Why did the Brookside Angels have a ghost on their team?
To add a little team spirit.

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Which baseball player holds water?
The pitcher

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Why are baseball games at night?
The bats sleep during the day.

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What is the difference between Yankee fans and dentists?
One roots for the yanks, and the other yanks for the roots.

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I love the fall. It gives me a chance to sit at home and watch the World Series.
Just like the Dodgers.

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How do baseball players keep in touch?
They touch base every once in a while.

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What’s the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot’s father?
One’s a pop fly. The other’s a fly pop.

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