Animal Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

A lion once put his head inside the mouth of Chuck Norris.

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

What do cows usually fly around in?
Helicowpters and Bulloons.

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Animal Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Why do women have 2% more brains then a соw?
So, when you pull their тiтs they won't shiт on the floor.

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Jokes about Women Animal Jokes Boob Jokes

Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

A worm gets out from cherry compote and, after he stretches a little, says satisfied:
I love sauna!

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Animal Jokes Love Jokes

Teacher: Give me an example of animal.
Jimmy: Frog
Teacher: Give me another.
Jimmy: Another Frog.

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Animal Jokes

When a bull wants to listen to a cassette, what does he put on his head?
Steer phones.

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Animal Jokes Music and Musician Jokes

There where two snakes talking.
The 1st one said 'Sidney, are we the type of snakes who wrap ourselves around our prey and squeeze and crush until they're dead?
Or are we the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are poisioned?'.
Then the second Snake says "Why do you ask?"
The 1st one replies:
"I just bit my lip!"

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Animal Jokes

You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right?
Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla".
Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

If toast always lands butter-side down and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast to the back of a cat and drop it?

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Animal Jokes

Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.

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Animal Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

What did the mooron say when he saw the milk cartons in the grass?
"Hey! Look at the соw's nest!"

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Animal Jokes

A man went to work for a zoo veterinarian.
"Look in the lion's mouth," the vet told him.
"How do I do that?" he asked.
"Carefully," replied the vet.

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Office and Work Jokes Animal Jokes Men jokes

Two flies sit on a pile of роор. One fly passes gas.
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey, do you mind? I'm eating here."

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Gross Jokes Food Jokes Animal Jokes

The Taco Веll Chihuahua, a Doberman and a bulldog are in a doggie bar having a drink when a good-looking female collie comes up to them and says, ''Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me.
'' The Doberman says, ''I love liver and cheese.'' The collie replies, ''That's not good enough.'' The bulldog says, ''I hate liver and cheese.'' She says, ''That's not creative.'' Finally the Chihuahua says, ''Liver alone - cheese mine.''

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Partying and Bad Behavior Jokes Jokes about Women Animal Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

What should you call a bald teddy?
Fred bear .

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Animal Jokes

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the сriме. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!'

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Blonde Jokes Office and Work Jokes Animal Jokes Police Officer Jokes Dog jokes

What did the spider do on the computer?
Made a website!

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IT jokes Technology Jokes Animal Jokes Computer Jokes Programmer Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes