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Attitude Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves!

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Attitude Jokes

Some people think that their life experience compensates for their lack of brain.

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Attitude Jokes

When my boss asked me who is the sтuрid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire sтuрid people.

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Attitude Jokes

If you say "I knew you were going to say that" enough. You can start billing people for psychic readings.

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Attitude Jokes

If you can't beat the record, you can beat up its owner.

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Attitude Jokes

"What else can we think about?"
- Insomnia

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Attitude Jokes

I am known at the gym as the "before picture."

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Attitude Jokes

Here, you can always find a party. Where I come from, the Party can always find you.

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Attitude Jokes

They said too much of everything is bad... But too much of goodness ain't bad?

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Attitude Jokes

Sorry I didn't text you back, but my phone recognized your number.

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Attitude Jokes

The only reason I've been going out with this guy all summer is because I have no idea how to operate my gas grill.

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Attitude Jokes

All I'm saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old?

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Attitude Jokes

I'm good at multitasking and procrastinating, which means right now there are at least 28 things that I'm putting off until later.

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Attitude Jokes

Just tell me when and where and I'll be there 20 minutes late.

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Attitude Jokes

There's never enough time to do it right, but there's always enough time to do it over.

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Attitude Jokes

You can't have everything, where would you put it?

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Attitude Jokes

If it ain't broke, I haven't borrowed it yet.

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Attitude Jokes

I'm at my most amazing when no one is paying attention.

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Attitude Jokes

I'm an antisocial-psychic. I can see ahead of time that I won't want to talk to you.

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Attitude Jokes

Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.

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