Canadian jokes

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Canadian summer
I asked my Canadian buddy "Did you have a good summer?"
He said "No! I was working that day."

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If I had a Nickel for every terrible Canadian rock band, I know I'd at least get a Nickelback.
I'll let myself out.

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U. S. singles may be bills, and Canadian singles may be coins...
... But Asian singles are in my area.

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What's the difference between imitation bread and the Canadian prime minister?
One is fake dough, the other is Trudeau.

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A Canadian accidentally bumped into a hard of hearing person.
Legend has it that they're still saying sorry to each other.

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A baby seal walks into a bar...
... and says,"I'll have anything but a Canadian Club."

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Heard this while at a Canadian airport.
Lady: We're going to the states for a few days.
Oldman: I wouldn't do that if I were you.
Lady: Why not?
Oldman: It's full of Americans.

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How do you sink a Canadian submarine?
You knock on the door and they will open it and invite you in for a beer

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What did the canadian guy say after working out at a gym so much the machines broke?
I'm sorey...

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A Canadian man visits a lighthouse...
The lighthouse keeper is with him at the top, cleaning the bulb, when a loud horn is heard in the distance.
"What's that about?", the Canadian asks.
"Yes."

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With all this outrage over blackface I'm here to defend our Canadian Prime Minster as the most Canadian Prime Minister ever.
I mean who else ever said I'm sorry so much over his double dark roast?

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Why do Canadian School Teachers bring pain killers before teaching the alphabet?
Because E is always sore

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ONLY AMERICAN AND CANADIAN'S WILL GET THIS RIGHT AWAY. Why can't a hand be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.

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Told my Canadian friend my Alcoholics Anonymous teacher gave my homework an A
"You got an AA A, eh?"

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Some people say I speak very Canadian
But I'm only half Canadian E

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A man was going to a Canadian restaurant
He orders his food, and when the waiter comes around he asks “how is your food?”
“It’s meh.” He replies
The waiter looks at him, and says “yeah, and it’ll be June next.”

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What do you call a Canadian with sunburn
A tourist

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A Canadian was told to throw out the trash
And thats why we Have Justin Bieber in the U. S

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How to make any Canadian really angry
When they tell you that they love hokey, ask them which type.

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Why dont Canadian colleges have spring break
First , you need spring.

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