Canadian jokes

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Jaws Canada

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Canadian jokes

Canadian guy: Let’s watch a movie.
American: Sure. How about The Titanic?
Canadian: What’s that about?
American: Yes. A big one. It sank.

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Canadian jokes

My wife says I get mean when I drink whiskey. Now I drink Canadian whiskey.
I am still mean but I am apologetic aboot it. #sorry

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Canadian jokes

What do you call a Mexican-Canadian рiмр business?
Hoes, eh?

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Canadian jokes

Canadian summer
I asked my Canadian buddy "Did you have a good summer?"
He said "No! I was working that day."

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Canadian jokes

If I had a Nickel for every terrible Canadian rock band, I know I'd at least get a Nickelback.
I'll let myself out.

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Canadian jokes

U. S. singles may be bills, and Canadian singles may be coins...
... But Asian singles are in my area.

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Canadian jokes

What's the difference between imitation bread and the Canadian prime minister?
One is fake dough, the other is Trudeau.

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Canadian jokes

A Canadian accidentally bumped into a hard of hearing person.
Legend has it that they're still saying sorry to each other.

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Canadian jokes

A baby seal walks into a bar...
... and says,"I'll have anything but a Canadian Club."

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Canadian jokes

Heard this while at a Canadian airport.
Lady: We're going to the states for a few days.
Oldman: I wouldn't do that if I were you.
Lady: Why not?
Oldman: It's full of Americans.

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Canadian jokes

How do you sink a Canadian submarine?
You knock on the door and they will open it and invite you in for a beer

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Canadian jokes

What did the canadian guy say after working out at a gym so much the machines broke?
I'm sorey...

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Canadian jokes

A Canadian man visits a lighthouse...
The lighthouse keeper is with him at the top, cleaning the bulb, when a loud horn is heard in the distance.
"What's that about?", the Canadian asks.
"Yes."

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Canadian jokes

With all this outrage over blackface I'm here to defend our Canadian Prime Minster as the most Canadian Prime Minister ever.
I mean who else ever said I'm sorry so much over his double dark roast?

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Canadian jokes

Why do Canadian School Teachers bring pain killers before teaching the alphabet?
Because E is always sore

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Canadian jokes

ONLY AMERICAN AND CANADIAN'S WILL GET THIS RIGHT AWAY. Why can't a hand be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.

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Canadian jokes

Told my Canadian friend my Alcoholics Anonymous teacher gave my homework an A
"You got an AA A, eh?"

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Canadian jokes

Some people say I speak very Canadian
But I'm only half Canadian E

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Canadian jokes

A man was going to a Canadian restaurant
He orders his food, and when the waiter comes around he asks “how is your food?”
“It’s meh.” He replies
The waiter looks at him, and says “yeah, and it’ll be June next.”

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Canadian jokes

What do you call a Canadian with sunburn
A tourist

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Canadian jokes

A Canadian was told to throw out the trash
And thats why we Have Justin Bieber in the U. S

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Canadian jokes

How to make any Canadian really angry
When they tell you that they love hokey, ask them which type.

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Canadian jokes

Why dont Canadian colleges have spring break
First , you need spring.

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Canadian jokes

Man, Jian Ghomenshi had the Canadian public eating out of his hand...
... but he totally choked!

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Canadian jokes

Why do Canadian's say "A" so much?
Just look at our name. C-A-N-A-D-A

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Canadian jokes

- Mommie, what is a Canadian? - It's an unarmed North American with health insurance, sweetie

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Now that's 100% Canadian!

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Canadian jokes

In Canada, "friends with benefits" means neighbors who have snow blowers.

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Welcome to Edmonton, where if you miss an exit you may as well go on vacation

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Canadian jokes Car and driving jokes

Today I learned that РоrnНuв is a Canadian company.
I bet if they blocked it in America, this whole trade war would end prematurely.

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My friend studying in Canada sent me this. Organic Chemistry is his favorite and everyone attends all the classes

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