Dirty jokes - Page 108

KICKASS if you wish your partner would do the things you read on here to you. And KICKASS if some of these jokes make your рussy clench or, your diск start to rise.

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Dirty jokes

You can tell I've been married for a while. Went to the doctor's last week, he said, 'Have you had sеx in the last seven days?' And I said, 'No, my birthday's in April.'

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Marriage and Family Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

I was in a relationship for like eight-and-a-half years, and then I was re-released into the wild not too long ago. So, my internal 'How To Read a Woman Manual' has like a drawing of Dwight and Mamie Eisenhower on the cover, holding hands in a rumble seat and sipping sodas and strangling communists. And I'm just waiting until I can unzip my pants and find a family of raccoons living down there.

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Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes Relationship Jokes

Anybody get a random вiтсh phone call? Oh, you know what I mean. The women that found the phone number, then call it. This woman called me up, talking about, 'Look, I don't know who you is, but I found your phone number in my man's pocket. And you better not be fooling around with my man.' So I said, 'Honey, I don't know who you is either, but I'm gonna give you a little woman-to-woman advice. If you're having a problem in your relationship -- you think your man is cheating on you -- that's something you need to talk over with your man...' So I woke him up, gave him the phone and let her talk to him.

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Jokes about Women Dirty jokes Men jokes Relationship Jokes

Just be arrested for indecency at my local homeless shelter after trying to help them cook Christmas dinner. Apparently they told me to PLUCK the turkey.

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Dirty jokes Christmas Jokes

Once a girl asked her father, dad whats sеx? The father es shocked by this question, with a little hesitation he explanied her about the birds and bees talk, little weirded out the girl said mom was explaning me about the 2 SECTS of christianity......

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Dad Jokes

There once was this really poor family. They were so poor that they lived on a bunk bed, the parents lived on the top bed and the son lived on the bottom bed. One night the mom and dad were having sеx and so they used code words, for harder they said cheese and for faster they said tomato. The kept screaming cheese, cheese, cheese, tomato, tomato, tomato. The son then said mom dad can you stop making sandwiches you're getting mayo all over my bed.

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Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Dad Jokes

What do you call a Russian hоокеr? Onyabackyabish.

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Dirty jokes

My uncle once еjасulатеd on me. Glad I got that off my chest.

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Dirty jokes

What did the left веаvеr lip say to the right?
We used to be so tight before that holiday to Jamaica!

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Dirty jokes

No matter who's president, it costs us money whatever they like. [Reagan] likes jelly beans. Carter liked peanuts; the price of peanuts went up. When Kennedy was president, you couldn't get a hоокеr for under $75.

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Money jokes Dirty jokes

The national debt isn't the only thing that's rising.

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Nationality Jokes Dirty jokes

I'm staying with a guy I went to high school with, in a one bedroom, which is oh so private. We got signals on the door just in case one of us has a magazine in the room.

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School Jokes Dirty jokes

Q. What does оrаl sеx with an ugly women and rock climbing have in common?
A. They‘re both more enjoyable if you don’t look down.

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Jokes about Women Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

They blame everything on El Nino. When I can't get it up, I go, 'Baby, it's El Nino. It ain't me, baby. I'm a man -- it's El Nino, see? -- it's a warm front in the ocean, that's why this ain't working.'

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Office and Work Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes

There is a little girl on a bike and a cop
On a horse. The cop goes up to the
Little girl and says " did you get that
Bike from Santa?" Little girl says yes.
The cop says next year ask Santa for
Some reflectors and the cop gave her
A $5 fine. Then the girl replies hey cop
Did Santa get you that horse for
Christmas. He says yes. She says tell
Santa next year put the diск on the
Bottom of the horse not the top. LOL!!
My dad is trying to get 500 jаскаss!!!!

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Dirty jokes Christmas Jokes Dad Jokes

I've been a dad for awhile. I've noticed that certain things don't change about a child, no matter what stage of development they're in. When they're really small, just learning how to walk, you always have to tell them the same thing over and over again:
'Watch out. Don't touch that. Don't put that in your mouth.' Now my daughter is almost a teenager. Are we all on the same page on that? Because I really don't want to have to draw a diagram for that one.

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Dirty jokes Dad Jokes

Billy woke up one morning and headed downstairs for breakfast. His dad was already there, reading the newspaper. Billy sat down and was about to eat until he thought about something. "Dad, why do we never see Mom in the morning," he inquired. His father lowered the newspaper to reveal a face of pure excitement, answering, "Look under the table, son."

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Dirty jokes Dad Jokes

Apparantly some butch lеsвiаns have now started taking viаgrа to become harder!!

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Dirty jokes

My computer's got Miley Virus. It has stopped twerking.

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Dirty jokes