Dirty jokes

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A businessman is going on a business trip but wants to get something for his wife so that she can give herself pleasure whilst he's away, so he decides to go to a sеx shop. The guy didn't like the idea of his wife having sеx with another man so he didn't buy a вlоw up doll. After looking at all the sеx toys, dildоs and вlоw up dolls, he asks the old man at the cash register if he has anything else. "Yes I do." Says the old man. He gets a wooden box out and opens it. " It looks like an ordinary dildо." Says the businessman. " No it's no ordinary dildо; watch this: Voodoo diск, the door!" The dildо starts twisting at the door, "Voodoo diск, get back in the box!"
"How much does it cost?" Asks the businessman. "Sorry it's not for sale."
" I'll pay you $500."
"Okay" says the old man and sells the dildо.
When the wife is on her own she opens the box and says:
" Voodoo diск, my рussy!"
So the dildо gives her pleasure until after three оrgаsмs gets bored, but doesn't know how to tell it to stop so she puts her clothes back on and gets in her car to drive to the hospital. She has another оrgаsм and the car sways, a policeman pulls her over:
" Are you drunк? Asks the police officer. "No, I've got a voodoo diск stuck inside me."
So the policeman says:
"Voodoo diск my аss!
Office and Work Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes Police Officer Jokes
There is a man and a woman,they just met at a bar and started conversing, the woman is a easy going, always wanting to try new things type of person, the man is a hаrdсоrе hunter and hunting enthusiast, and very often goes hunting with his dogs.
The woman has never gone hunting before in her life, and has always wanted to
After 7 years of dating they decide to get married, and the man has promised to take her hunting the day after their wedding day.
The day comes, the man has gotten all of his equipment ready and packed his truck. BUT the weather is really bad; its cold, its raining and etc. ITS REALLY BAD WEATHER
The woman decides to tell her husband that she does not want to go hunting anymore.
The man, now disappointed and рissеd off, says to his wife "you have a choice, either you come and hunt with me or you вlоw me. Now im going to get the dogs ready, that will give you enough time to decide."
While her husband is away, she thinks about it.
When he comes back she tells him "well im not going hunting so i guess im going to have to вlоw you"
She starts blowing him and then stops for a moment, then says in a disgusted tone "aghh it tastes like s*it"
The man looks straight in the eye and says "well the dogs didnt want to go hunting either"
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