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Dog jokes

Newest jokes in this category

I saw a blind man in the GroceryStore today and he was swinging his guide dog around his head. I asked “what are you doing”
He’s reply “Just having a quick look around”.

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Dog jokes

My wife said she's going to start calling our dogs Dog 1 and Dog 2.
I replied with, "That's mean, do you want me to call you Wife 1?"
She asked,
"Why do I have to be Wife 1?"
I asked her, "Would you rather be Wife 2?"

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Dog jokes

What do you call a person crossing a road in broad daylight, dressed as a clown carrying John Wick's dog?
Anything you want, cos if he's carrying John Wick's dog, he hasn't got much time to live.

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Dog jokes

My dog's name is Butter. one day, I went outside and accidentally stepped on his testicles.
Anybody want some butter nut squash?

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Dog jokes

We’ve all heard about the dog that walks into a bar
But have you heard the one about the baby seal that walks into a club?

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Dog jokes

Some say a hot dog tastes better when flattened like a pancake
Quite frankly, that’s balogna.

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Dog jokes

My dog got into my leftover Chinese food
It’s a dog eat dog world out there

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Food Jokes Dog jokes

I should put my dog on a diet...
He is getting a little husky

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Dog jokes

How does a German Shepherd greet you?
“Guten dog!”

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Dog jokes

If you crossed a dog and a bear together, what would you get?
A dead dog.

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Dog jokes

How do they call dog cakes in Turkey?
Barklava.

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Turkey Jokes Dog jokes

Where to find a sweet dog?
At a korean restarant.

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Dog jokes

Who is my dog's favorite president?
Bark Obam—
No. That is not even a president, steve. My favorite is abraham lincoln. Tell them.
But then it won't be funny.
Steve.
... My dog's favorite president is Abraham Lincoln.

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Dog jokes

Did you hear about the dog which had puppies on the side of the road?
It was arrested for littering!!

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Dog jokes

A German shepherd peed outside my house yesterday...
Next week, he's bringing his dog

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Dog jokes

Yesterday, when my girlfriend came home, I said::
"Hi, Sweetie! I've got another riddle for you. What has four legs, and doesn't move?"
She answered:
"That's easy... A chair!"
- "Wrong! It's your sweet Corgi-dog..."

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Dog jokes

How do you know if someone adopted their dog?
Don't worry they will tell you

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Dog jokes

Every morning this week a German Shepherd has been taking a dump on my lawn
Yesterday he brought his dog.

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Dog jokes

What do you call a dog kennel in San Francisco?
Luxury apartments

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Dog jokes

TIL Hellen Keller owned a dog. Did you know that?
Neither did she.

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Dog jokes