Fitness jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Exercise can add years to your life. For example, I just ran 2 miles and I now feel like I’m 82

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Fitness jokes

When you stop and think about them, treadmills are fuскing dangerous.

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Fitness jokes

What do you call Adolf Нiтlеr's personal gym?
The liftwaffe.

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Hitler Jokes Fitness jokes

If the shoe fits perfectly why did it fall off

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Fitness jokes

Knock knock
Who’s there
Insomnia
You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can 't cry myself to sleep anymore…

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Fitness jokes

I almost forgot to update my status that I’d been to the gym.
What a waste of a workout that would have been!

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Office and Work Jokes Fitness jokes

The doctor told me I need to cut any excess fат out of my lifestyle.
I couldn’t be any more delighted, I’ve finally got the excuse I needed to divorce my wife.

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Fitness jokes Fat Jokes

So I’m in the gym minding my own business when the guy next to me says:
“Hey, man, I can bench 300 pounds - what can you do?”
“Er, read.”

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Men jokes Fitness jokes

I exercise by running up the street knocking on all the doors.
Jehovah's fitness.

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Fitness jokes

Once again the award for the most sтuрid act ever was given to a man who glued his hands to the bars on a treadmill.
That’s two years running now.

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Men jokes Fitness jokes

I was standing nакеd in front of the mirror admiring my 6 pack ……
But, it started to get warm, so I put the beers back in the fridge.

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Fitness jokes Beer Jokes

I knew getting a treadmill would help my wife get more exercise.
She started this morning and is already half away across the room towards it.

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Fitness jokes

I was pumping some iron in the gym yesterday, when the trainer pointed out that the hole in the weights was supposed to be for attaching them to a bar.

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Fitness jokes

Each mile you run adds 1 minute to your life, so when you’re 80 you can spend an extra 6 months in a nursing home at $10,000 per month.

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Fitness jokes

The gym is like church to some people.
No matter what they do all week, they think they can erase it with one visit.

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Fitness jokes

I came home from the gym this morning staggering and sweating after pushing my body to the limit … And all I did was sign up.

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Fitness jokes

I love the gym this time of year.
The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model.

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Fitness jokes

At the gym… just finished my 3rd set of selfies.

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Fitness jokes

If rolling your eyes burned calories, Facebook would be my gym.

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Facebook Jokes Fitness jokes

I finally told my wife the truth; that I was seeing a psychiatrist.
Then she told me the truth: that she is seeing a psychiatrist, two bartenders, the mailman and her fitness trainer.

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Fitness jokes Cheating Jokes