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One-Liner Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

My wife asked me today if I had seen the dog bowl...
I said I didn’t know he could!

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One-Liner Jokes Dog jokes

WORST HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS FOR A RETIREMENT HOME EVER

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One-Liner Jokes Halloween Jokes

Despite what some people think, since the world is arguably 75% water that is not carbonated,...
One could accurately say that it's technically flat.

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One-Liner Jokes

I went to see my doctor this morning. “Some one decided to graffiti my house last night!” I raged.
“So why are you telling me?” the doctor asked.
“I can't understand the writing,” I replied. “Was it you?”

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

A police officer saw a car speeding down the highway, and he started chasing after the speeder. When he got close, he saw that it was a woman who was knitting while driving.
The cop yelled, "Pull over!"
She shouted back, "No, it's a sweater!"

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

We're having the same thing this year for Thanksgiving dinner as last year: relatives.

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One-Liner Jokes Thanksgiving Jokes

DON'T HATE MONDAY. MAKE MONDAY HATE YOU.

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One-Liner Jokes Monday jokes

What constitutes a big breakfast? Well, in France, an egg is an oeuf to eat.

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Nationality Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Lexicographer Noah Webster was blessed with define inspiration.

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One-Liner Jokes

Ancient Romans considered vomitoriums a good place to un-wine.

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One-Liner Jokes

I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting!”
So we stopped playing chess.

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One-Liner Jokes

Doctor: You have a disease, but we can treat it.
Patient: What’s the Cure?
Doctor: It’s an 80s rock band fronted by Robert Smith, but let’s try to stay focused...

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes Music and Musician Jokes

Look at the bright side... At least Mondays only happen once a week!

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One-Liner Jokes Monday jokes

Three years ago my doctor told me I was going deaf... I haven’t heard from him since

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

A literature teacher is explaining the power of poems and stories. "Have you ever read something that made you cry?"
A student replied, "Yeah, my last report card."

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School Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"Are you going to be using your lawn mower Saturday?"
"Yes, I will be."
"Good... so can I borrow your car then?"

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One-Liner Jokes

A grandmother sent her grandson a shirt for his birthday. The only trouble was that he had a size 14 neck and the shirt was size 12.
When the grandson sent a thank you note, he wrote, “Dear Grandma. Thanks a lot for the shirt. I’d write more, but I’m all choked up.”

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One-Liner Jokes Old People Jokes Grandparent Jokes

Diск: Great News! Teacher said we would have a test rain or shine.
Jane: What’s so great about that?
Dick: It’s snowing.

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School Jokes One-Liner Jokes

I'm an investor in mashed potatoes. I receive lump some payments.

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One-Liner Jokes

This is Friday <3

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One-Liner Jokes Friday jokes