One-Liner Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Good: You give the birds and bees talk to your daughter.
Bad: She keeps interrupting.
Worse: With corrections.

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One-Liner Jokes

Yep, today is Monday, guys :(

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One-Liner Jokes Monday jokes

- Doctor, there is a patient on line 1 that say he's invisible.
- Well, tell him I can't see him right now.

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Someone saw a blonde eating a Tootsie Roll Pop and asked her, "So, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll - Tootsie Pop?"
Without a thought, the blonde replied, "Beats me, but it took almost the whole day just to liск through the wrapper."

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Young Maiden: "Yes, I've been asked many times to get married."
Friend: "Really, who's asked you?"
Young Maiden: "My mother and father."

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One-Liner Jokes

A man went to the doctor and said: “Doctor, I keep having visions of the future.”
“When did these start?”
“Next Thursday.”

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

I can’t take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him...
I guess that’s what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

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Animal Jokes One-Liner Jokes Dog jokes

Everyone has heard of the historical figure, Karl Marx...
But no one remembers his sister, Onya, who invented the starting pistol.

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One-Liner Jokes

Dad, will you help me with my homework?"
"I'm sorry," replied the father. "It wouldn't be right."
"Well, " said the boy, "at least you could try."

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Parent Jokes One-Liner Jokes

When I was married, my wife used to call me handsome. As a matter of fact, we are now divorced but she STILL calls me handsome. Every time I have some money, she says, HANDSOME OVER.

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One-Liner Jokes Divorce Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes

In court to plead his case, an alleged auto thief listened as the judge asked the simple question, "How do you plead?"
The defendant, representing himself replied, "Before I plead, your honor, I'd like to explain just why I stole that car."

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Judge and Court Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Tim: I wish I had the money to buy an elephant.
Tom: What do you want with an elephant?
Tim: Nothing, I just want the money.

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One-Liner Jokes

The CEO of IKEA was just elected president in Sweden.
He should have his cabinet together by the end of the week.

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One-Liner Jokes

Doctor:
"Have you been drinking fluids?"
Patient:
"Jeez, Doc, that's literally all I drink."

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One-Liner Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes

What gender pronouns does a chocolate bar use?
Her/she.

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One-Liner Jokes

Where do ghosts like to travel on vacation?
The Dead Sea! What did the mother ghost say to the baby ghost as they drove down the street?
Buckle your sheet bel

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One-Liner Jokes Halloween Jokes

My twin brother called me from prison.
He said:
“You know how we finish each other’s sentences?”

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One-Liner Jokes

ME: What does "competitive salary" mean?
BOSS: It means your salary will be competing with your bills.

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One-Liner Jokes Boss Jokes

Children are like pancakes.
The first one always comes out a little weird.

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One-Liner Jokes

Lawyer Kurt: Did the woman standing in the passage subsequently reveal her identity?
Witness: Yes, that's right.
Lawyer Kurt: Who did she say she was?
Witness (seemingly inebriated) : She said she was the owner of the dog's wife.

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Judge and Court Jokes One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes