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Вицове за училището School Jokes Schulwitze Chistes de la escuela Анекдоты про школу Blagues sur l'école Barzellette sulla scuola Ανέκδοτα για το σχολείο Вицеви за училиштето Okul fıkraları Жарти про школу Piadas sobre a escola Dowcipy o szkole Skolvitsar School Moppen Skolevittigheder Skolevitser Koululaisvitsit Iskolai viccek Glume despre școală Vtipy o škole Mokykliniai anekdotai Joki par skolu un skolēniem Vicevi o školi
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School Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
Teacher:
"Where was the Constitution of India signed?"
Student:
"At the bottom of the page!"
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School Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
It was the first day of school. Harry's mother went into his bedroom and said,
"Come on Harry, get up now. You have to go to school today."
"But I don't want to go to school," replied Harry, "I want to stay in bed. Why do I have to go to school"?
"Because," answered his mother, "you're a teacher!"
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School Jokes
Teacher: Will any idiот in the room stand up please?
(a student stands up)
Teacher: Why do you think you are an idiот? Student: actually I don't, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself.
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School Jokes
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory today. I hope there's no pop quiz.
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School Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
Teacher:
"What is the present tense for the sentence 'I killed someone'?"
Student:
"The present tense would be 'I am in prison.'"
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School Jokes
A boy was at school and his teacher asked him to learn 3 new words over the weekend. His father is a pilot and taught him the word "takeoff." His mother is a zoo keeper and taught him the word "zebra." His big sister was going to have a baby and taught him the word "baby." He went to school the next day and his teacher asked,
"What are your three words?" The boy said,
"Takeoff zebra baby."
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School Jokes
Teacher:
"What is the largest city?"
Student:
"Electricity!"
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School Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
The teacher was teaching in animal lesson.
Teacher: What does a pig do?
Student: it rolls around in mud.
Teacher: Good! What does a соw do?
Student: It makes milk!
Teacher: Great! Now, what does a crazy old monkey give you?
Student: Homework!
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School Jokes Insult Jokes
A teacher asks a student, "Are you ignorant or just apathetic?" The kid answers, "I don't know and I don't care."
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School Jokes Kids Jokes
A boy went home from school. His homework was to put down the things his family said.
So he goes to his mother who was talking on the phone. The boy asked "Mum, can you help me do my homework? The mother says "Shut up!" And goes back talking on the phone. The boy wrote that down.
He then went to his father watching a football commercial saying "Неll yeah!"
So the boy wrote that down.
The boy went to his little sister and his sister said "Lollipop, Lollipop"
So the boy wrote that down.
The boy went to his little brother and the brother said "DUNDUNUNUNUN, BATMAN!"
So the boy wrote that down.
The next day, the boy went to school and the teacher said "So what are the words?"
The boy said "Shut up!"
The teacher, shocked, calmly said " Do you want to go to the principal's office?"
The boy said "Неll yeah!"
So at the principal's office, the principal said "What do you think you deserve in this situation?"
The boy said "Lollipop lollipop!"
The principal yelled "Who do you think you are?!"
And the boy said " DUNUNUNUNU, BATMAN!"
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School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes
Johnny's teacher told the class to say a sentence using the word beautiful twice. A girl sitting next to Johnny said,
"My mother put on a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it." The teacher said "Very good." Johnny raised his hand and said,
"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father she was pregnant and he said, 'Beautiful, fuскing beautiful!'"
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School Jokes
What type of exam does the vampire teacher give his students?
A blood test.
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School Jokes
I hate school and got caught skipping the other day. My principal said,
"Walk normal next time, you fruitcake."
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School Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
Teacher asks to a student that if I give you 3+3 rabbits, how many do you have"?
Student tells, I will have 7 rabbits.
Teacher asks, how?
Student tells, i already have 1 rabbit.
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School Jokes Animal Jokes
What's the difference between a pygmy tribe and a high school girls track team?
The pygmy tribe is a bunch of cunning little runts.
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School Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
What did the verb say when the words have, has, and had were removed from the English language?
"Nobody's perfect!"
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School Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
A mom of an eight year old boy is awaiting her son's arrival from school. As he runs in, he says he needs to talk to her about making babies. He claims he knows about the development of a fetus, but doesn't understand the answer to the million dollar question. Namely, how does the sреrм get into the woman? The mom asks the boy what he thinks the answer is. The boy says that the sреrм is manufactured in the man's stomach, rises up to his chest, then throat, and into his mouth, where he then kisses the woman and deposits the sреrм into her mouth. The mom tells her boy that it is a good guess, but it's wrong. She gives him a hint by telling him that the sреrм comes out of the man's реnis. Suddenly, the boy's face becomes quite red and he says,
"You mean you put your mouth on that thing?"
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Jokes about Women School Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes
There was once a black boy, a jewish boy, and an Italian in 3rd grade. One day, they decided to play "who has the biggest diск". The Jew whipped it out, and then the Italian, and then the black. They looked at the black diск in astonishment, and told him it's huge because he's black.
That night at the dinner table, he told his parents "the other boys at school said that my diск is big because I'm black, is this true?" She replied, "no son, it's because you're 24".
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School Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes
A kid comes home from school and so excitedly telling his dad ,daddy daddy the teacher asked a question at school today and I was the only one who answered it,
His father replies congratulations to my son I am proud but what was the question ?
Who broke the dамn window....
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Que le dice un cuatro a un cero Η δύσκολη ερώτηση Ποιός έσπασε το τζάμι του σχολείου;; Η ερώτηση Иванчо се прибира късно от училище: Fritzchen kommt von der Schule zurück. Andrea torna a casa da scuola tutto soddisfatto e dice alla mamma: Lille Per kom hjem fra skolen. – Hva lærte du i dag, da? spurte moren. – Frøken spurte om noe som bare jeg kunne svare på. – Hva var det, da? – Hvem som knuste ruta i gymsalen. En dag kom lilla Elin hem från skolan helt överlycklig. - Varför är du så glad? frågade pappan. - Jo, för att fröken ställde en fråga och det var bara jag som kunde svaret. - Jaha, vad var det för... Móricka hazafelé tart mamájával az iskolából. A mama megkérdezi: - Mi volt ma az iskolában, kisfiam? - Képzeld mama, ma én voltam az egyetlen, aki jelentkezett! - Nagyon ügyes vagy Móricka! Mi volt... Petriukas: - Mama, mama, šiandien mokykloje aš pirmas pakėliau ranką! - O koks buvo klausimas? - teiraujasi mama. - Kas isdaužė langą?! - Mi volt ma az iskolában, kisfiam? - Anya, ma én voltam az egyetlen aki jelentkezett, amikor a tanítónéni kérdést tett fel! - Nagyon ügyes vagy Pistike! És mi volt a kérdés? - Ki törte be az ablakot? Došao Perica kući i kaže tati: Tata,tata danas sam ja jedini digao ruku na času! Tata:Bravo sine tatko treba svaki dan a koje je bilo pitanje? Perica:Ko je razbio prozor Petriukas, grįžęs namo iš mokyklos, giriasi mamai: - Šiandien aš vienintelis žinojau, kaip teisingai atsakyti į mokytojo klausimą. - O koks buvo tas klausimas? - Kas išdaužė klasės langą?
School Jokes
A boy asked his teacher"Can I go to the tolilet please miss?" but the teacher said "No, we're doing the alphabet" 5 Minutes later he asked again and the teacher says "no, it's your turn to do the alphabet." So he goes " A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z". Then the teacher askes "where's your P?" He replies with "It's halfway down my leg miss"
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School Jokes
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