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Christmas Jokes

Most popular in this category
So I guess 2016 was George Michael's
Last Christmas
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Last Christmas, George Michael's heart gave up...
Now he's never gonna dance again.
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George Michael was jus here...
And then wham!
It was his last Christmas
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Jokes on this subreddit is every Christmas present from an old person...
You get it, you appreciate the thought, but then you give it away to someone else in a slightly different packaging without a second thought.
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What does Rick Grimes do at Christmas?
Go Christmas CORALing
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My friend wants to look more like Kurt Cobain.
I'm getting him a shotgun for Christmas.
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Darth Vader is fighting Luke Skywalker...
Darth Vader says to Luke:
"Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas."
Luke:
"How could you possibly know?"
Vader:
"I felt your presents."
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What do all Muslim girls want for Christmas?
Blow up dolls.
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Where do you go to have a white Christmas in the 1940s?
Germany
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I hope I get $100 of bitcoin as a Christmas present
I mean $120.23
Edit $97.56
Edit 2 $103.55
Edit 3 $111.47
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Cinderella was waiting for her christmas photos to be sent in the mail.
Even though they were very late she stayed positive, thinking: ‘One day my prints will come’.
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I got my kid a puppy for Christmas but it died.
Now all I have is this puppy.
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What happened to the Portuguese man when he got no presents for Christmas?
He got post-Natal depression
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My mate wished me a Merry Christmas earlier.
A bit early, yes, but he suffers from premature congratulation.
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Hey! You know, they've started offering free meditation retreats at the North Pole!
Turns out the Christmas elves are really present minded.
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What do Christmas lights have in common with jeffery Epstein
They dont hang themselves
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The Jedi know what we're getting for Christmas
They have sensed our presents
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I wonder if George Michael was a оrgаn donor
So he could really give his heart to someone special this Christmas.
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What does a Christmas tree and a monk have in common?
They both have ornamental balls
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My parents tried to surprise me with a car this Christmas...
Fortunately they missed.
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