My 5 year old daughter wants a Тамроn for ChristmasShe has no idea what it is, but she knows what you can do with it.Swim, ride, hike, dance, play tennis, ... 0 0 0
I've just ordered a book called Overcome ProcrastinationI intend to read it over the Christmas holiday. 0 0 0
I got yelled at in LA today for singing Christmas Carols.I guess they don't wanna hear about how the weather outside is frightful, but the fire is so delightful. 0 0 0
Sherlock joke (my first post here)Patient: \**dying of cancer*\* No chance for you to be a doctor this time, Mr Homes!Doctor: Oh, do your research. I'm not a hero, I'm a high functioning homeopath. Merry Christmas! \**cuts off morphine supply\** 0 0 0
People ask how I'm so prepared for ChristmasIt's easy I had all presents wrapped and hidden in the attic since August, my girlfriend is going to love her new puppy 0 0 0
I recently bought a Christmas tree at a shop...The man at the cashier said to me "Are you going to put that up yourself?"I replied to him in disgust saying "No, that is disgusting! I'm going to put it up in my living room." 0 0 0
Why was the Christmas tree sent to the psych ward?Because it was suffering from ornamental health issues. 0 0 0
I went to shop to buy a Christmas tree.The man in the shop asked if I'll put it up myself.I said that I'll actually put it in the living room. 0 0 0
Thanks to the idiots who set off fireworks last night.It's only October! You scared my dogs so much that they knocked over my Christmas tree! 0 0 0
A man was picking out a Christmas treeA man was picking out a Christmas tree.When he goes to pay for it, the cashier asks him, "Will you be putting this up yourself?"The man replies,"Quit being disgusting! I'm putting it in my living room." 0 0 0
A man buys a Christmas tree.As he goes to pay for the tree, the attendant says,"Are you putting the tree up yourself?"The man replies,"Quit being disgusting. I'm putting the tree in my living room." 0 0 0
I was buying a Christmas tree the guy said "are you going to put it up yourself"I said "no it's going in the living room" 0 0 0
Some jokes I came up with when I was 10-13 years old*what does Santa want for Christmas? Ное Ное Hoes*what do hunters like to do? Shoot birds....................../´¯/)....................,/¯../.................../..../............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...').........\.................'...../.........."...\.......... _.·´............\..............(..............\.............\...*what did the tree say when the math teacher passed by? Gee-I'm-a-tree 0 0 0