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Chuck Norris Jokes

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In some countries, criminals have the option of either going to jail or spending a day living with Chuck Norris.
No one has ever chosen Chuck Norris

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Chuck Norris Jokes Prison Jokes

When Chuck Norris burns calories, he uses a flamethrower.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris can get breakfast at McDonalds after 11, at Taco Веll.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't smoke cigars.
He smokes smoke grenades.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress ваlls.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!

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Chuck Norris Jokes Military Jokes

Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris does not cleanse himself with your everyday shower.
He uses Meteor Showers.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same.
Nature knows perfection when she sees it.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris is so sharp you can cut yourself just by looking at him.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris can make a dog bark the alphabet, in spanish, backwards.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Dog jokes

When Jacques Cousteau reached the bottom of the sea he found Chuck Norris snorkeling.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability.
Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back.
The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.
They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.

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Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.

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Chuck Norris Jokes