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Dad Jokes

Most popular in this category
Your dad is in prison and he's got a stutter.
He's never going to finish his sentence.
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How do you make a joke into a dad joke
Make the punchline apparent.
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Ben was at home looking for his super cool amazingly fantastic awesome dad
When it was clear his dad wasn't inside sitting, he went to the window and saw....
That his dad was outstanding
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Why couldn't a transgender man see his mom and dad after he came out to his family?
Because they became transparents
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Classic dad joke, but in bad taste
So we were having a family dinner for the first time in a while.
My mum was saying how terrible the situation in Nepal is, when my Dad says "it's nepalling isn't it?"
I had a good laugh, feeling guilty after :(
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During dinner, Juan asked his mother....
Mamma, why is dad bald?
Well Juan, your father has a lot to think about and is very intelligent, that's why.
But mamma, why do you have such a long hair?
Shut UP Juan and eat your soup!
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I teased my dad about being bald, so he told me he was going to draw lots of rabbits on his head.
From a distance they will look like hares.
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What the difference between my dad and a police officer?
I don't need to be black for my dad to beat me.
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What's the difference between LSD and my dad?
LSD doesn't need to be drunк to hit me.
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My Dad got a Chia Obama head a couple of years ago.
The box said he would grow an afro, but nothing changed.
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My dad said this at his retirement... he is a former principal
"I remember a time when Harass was two words.
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Lebron's life is like one big compass...
He went South, His hairline went North, his dad went East and his mom went Delonte West.
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Today I pulled the dad jokes of all dad jokes.
At work, my coworker complained of ear pain. He asked me to look for a bump, so I looked.
Then, I said,
"Oh I know what's causing the pain!" He asked what it was, and I pulled a quarter from his ear..
I should be ashamed.
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A stormtrooper sits down to have dinner with his family...
His son asks him "dad what is this we are eating?"
The stromtrooper replies "Baby wookie steaks. How is it?"
His sons says "It's a little chewy."
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What's the difference between your dad and this joke?
This joke will be back someday
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My dad said his first car had a Dual-55 air conditioning system.
All you have to do is to roll down both of the windows and drive 55 miles an hour.
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How is my dad supposed to celebrate Fathers day
When it's on a Sonday
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So I have a pretty good fathers day joke
Can't wait to tell my dad when he finally brings the milk home
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Nurse to my dad at the hospital...
... after he was hit by a car on his bike: do you smoke?
Dad, still not sure who the current president is: only when I'm on fire
Nurse: looks to my mom
Mom: no.
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When I was a little kid, my dad would swear then say "Excuse my French"
One day the teacher asked if anyone could speak a foreign language and I raised my hand
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