Dirty jokes

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What is the difference between a sреrм and a lawyer? None, both have one in a million chance to be human beings.

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Dirty jokes Lawyer Jokes

Something's getting proactive in my pants!

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Dirty jokes

Once a nun was taking a bath when someone knocked on the door,
"Who is it?"
" It's the blind man, can I come in?"
She decides to let him,
"Okay"
She says, he walked in and says:
"Nice тiтs, now where do you want me to hang the blind?"

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Dirty jokes Men jokes Boob Jokes

Can i get 100 kickass for my dead bro

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Dirty jokes

Crocs are like gаy вlоw jobs,
The feel great until you look down.

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Dirty jokes

Making love to music can be really romantic but only if you last longer than the intro of track 01.

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Dirty jokes

Hey ваве, will you be my receiver? High five!

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Dirty jokes

Q. What do you call a Jewish girls воовs?
A. Joobs.

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Dirty jokes

Twinkle twinkle little prick
Why the hеll are you a dick
You think that you are super cool
When you look like a mother f*cking fool
Twinkle twinkle little prick
Go and suск yo mommas dick

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Dirty jokes

50 kick-аss and I will маsтurвате in school then fuск my girlfriend after school

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School Jokes Dirty jokes

God does not hate gаy people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.

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God Jokes Dirty jokes

I wish I was a Puerto Rican dude 'cause when it comes to baby making, Puerto Rican dudes -- ваng! -- first time, every time. Immaculate conception, my аss! You check the roster at Bethlehem, I guarantee you find a Jose Torres on it somewhere. Why do you think they named the kid Jesus?

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Kids Jokes Dirty jokes

She was like, 'Danny, I don't like that name! We don't have that stuff in this house. Nobody in this family uses that stuff. Your brothers don't use it, your father -- why do you want to use it?' I was like, 'What are you talking about, Ma? As a matter of fact, Uncle Louis always uses it.' She was like, 'Yeah, alright, Uncle Louis, maybe -- but nobody talks about it.'

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Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes

Can I marinate in your juices?

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Dirty jokes

When you see a bull, remember, he's horny

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Dirty jokes

Want to take a look at my benefit package?

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Dirty jokes

Just had a cup of tea with some Viаgrа sprinkled in it. It doesn’t really taste any different but its great at stopping your biscuits going soft.

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Dirty jokes

A five year old boy and his grandfather are sitting on the front porch together, when grandpa pulls a вееr out of a cooler. the little boy asked,
"Grandpa, can I have a вееr?" Grandpa replied, "Can your diск touch your аss?" The little boy answered no. Grandpa said "Then you're not man enough to have a вееr." A little later Grandpa lights up a cigar. The little boy asked,
"Grandpa, can I have a cigar?" Once again, Grandpa asked,
"Can your diск touch your аss?" The little boy answered no, again. Grandpa said,
"Then your not man enough to have a cigar." A little later, the little boy came out of the house With a cookie. Grandpa asked,
"Can I have a cookie?" The boy asked "Can your diск touch your аss?" Grandpa replied, "Неll yeah my diск can touch my аss!" The boy replied, "Then go fuск yourself, Grandma made these cookies for me."

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Dirty jokes Men jokes

Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing.
One old lady turns to the other and asks, "Do you still get hоrny?"

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Dirty jokes

Boy: dad can i take a shower to? Dad: no. Boy: but its my birthday. Dad: ok but dont look down. Boy: (looks down) what is that? Dad: its a lamborghini. Boy: ok. Boy: ( later on) mom can i take a shower to? Mom: no. Boy: but its my birthday. Mom: ok but dont look up or down. Boy: (looks up) what are those? Mom: headlights. Boy: ok (looks down) whats that? Mom: a garage. Boy: ok. Boy: ( later) mom and dad can i sleep with you. Dad: ok but dont looks under the covers. Boy: ( looks under covers) mommy turn on your headlights daddys parking the car in the garage.

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Dirty jokes Dad Jokes