Geek jokes

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It is a fact of nature that light arrives faster than
Sound. Which is why some people can appear quite bright, until they
Speak.

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Geek jokes

IT paradox?
The warmer a computer becomes, the more it freezes.

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Geek jokes

Why did Thor lose his power of lightning as a
Teenager?
Because he got grounded.

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Geek jokes

Panic, Chaos, Pandemonium – my work here is
Finished.

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Geek jokes

A superconductor comes into a bar.
"Hey!" says the barkeep, "we don't serve
Superconductors!"
The superconductor didn't put up any resistance.

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Geek jokes

Last words of a Jedi apprentice, "Of course I
Know which side the light saber comes out!"

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Geek jokes

What should I put on my tofu burger?
A curse!

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Geek jokes

Stephen Hawking died.
Have you tried turning him off and on again?

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Geek jokes

Jokes about communism are only good if everybody gets
Them.

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Geek jokes

My iPod is in Titanic mode right now. It is syncing.

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Geek jokes

A programmer gets shopping instructions from his
Wife: Go buy a cauliflower. If they have oranges, get two dozens. He
Comes home with 24 cauliflowers.

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Geek jokes

A web designer is filling out a form:
Age: 31
Height: 5'9"
Eye color: #008000

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Geek jokes

Two admins are talking, "This friend of mine
Shot down the main server yesterday within minutes."
"So what is he, like, a hacker?"
"No, an imbecile."

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Geek jokes

Do you think that when Han Solo married Princess
Leia, she demanded that he change his name to Han Married?

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Geek jokes

Intelligent Jokes

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Geek jokes

Beethoven: So what up, guys? Are you ready for some serious
Symphonies?
Excited crowd: YEEEAAAAHHHHH!!
Beethoven: I can't hear you!!!

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Geek jokes

Mother:
"Oh my Lord, your room is such a mess!
Why are there so many things on the floor?"
Son:
"Come on mom, duh. Gravity, of course!"

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Geek jokes

A young, dynamic software company is looking for a
Hacker. Please leave your structured CV in our "HUB_01"
Computer in the C:/Documents/Applicants folder.

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Geek jokes

God is dead. (Friedrich Nietzsche, 1882)
Nietzsche is dead. (God, 1900)

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Geek jokes

Christmas at the Schrödingers' was a rather
Awkward affair. Even days after Christmas, boxes were lying under the
Christmas tree that nobody dared open.

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Geek jokes

I've been a naughty girl... I think I
Deserve punishment..." she said suggestively, biting her lip.
"As you say," said he and installed Windows Vista on her
Laptop.

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Geek jokes

What is the difference between an IT guy and a
Regular guy?
A regular guy thinks a kilobyte has 1000 bites. An IT guy thinks a
Kilometer has 1024 meters.

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Geek jokes

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Geek jokes

What was written on the tombstone of a computer nerd?
Offline since 2020.

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Geek jokes

A floppy disc is kind of like Jesus, really.
It died and became the icon of saving.

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Geek jokes

They say that a PC user keeps a screwdriver and
Pliers next to his keyboard, while a Mac user keeps a glass of wine.
That actually makes sense because when your Mac malfunctions, all you
Can do is just get drunк.

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Geek jokes

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A dermatovenerologist.
Dermatovenerologist who?
You might want to take this talk somewhere a bit more private.

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Geek jokes

A distrainor rings the doorbell.
A voice comes from behind the door, "We're not home."
Distrainor:
"Correct, not anymore you aren't."

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Geek jokes

"I just don't understand how somebody
Could guess my PIN number!"
"What was your PIN?"
The date the emperor Aizong of the Jin dynasty committed suicide,
Bringing about the end of the Jin Dynasty."
"Wow, that sounds obscure enough, when was that?"
"In 1234."

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Geek jokes

Proper spelling and grammar is very important and for
Instance a coma can totally change the meaning of a statement.
Here's an example:
"Travis is in a rush."
"Travis is in a coma."

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Geek jokes

Super Funny Geek Jokes

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Geek jokes

An accused cannibal is trying to defend himself at
Court:
"Your Honor, if it really is as they say, You are what you
Eat, then I must insist I am a perfectly innocent victim here!"

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Geek jokes

Two blind people are walking, one of them with a
Twenty-meter white cane and nudges the other, "So, I got myself
This really sweet binoculars!"

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Geek jokes