Kids Jokes

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On July 20, 1969, as commander of the Apollo 11 lunar module, Neil Armstrong was the first person to set foot on the moon. His first words after stepping on the moon,
“That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind,” were televised to earth and heard by millions. But just before he reentered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark “good luck, Mr. Gorsky.”
Many people at nasa though it was a casual remark concerning some rival soviet cosmonaut however, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years many people questioned armstrong as to what the “good luck, Mr. Gorsky” statement meant, but Armstrong always just smiled.
On July 5, 1995, in Tampa Bay, Florida, while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26-year-old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded.
Mr. Gorsky had died, so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.
In 1938 when he was a kid in a small midwest town, he was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard.
His friend hit the ball, which landed in his neighbor’s yard by the bedroom windows.
His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky.
“Sеx! You want sеx?! You’ll get sеx when the kid next door walks on the moon!
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A black kid and his father are on an airplane.
The plane suddenly starts to lose altitude and the captain made an announcement.
“Attention passengers. Due to an engine failure we are forced we were forced to dump all your baggage to lighten the plane. Unfortunately the plane is still too heavy so we have no chocie but to start throwing out passengers by alphabetical order until the plane is light enough. We will start with the A’s. Will all African Americans please jump out of the plane.”
The little boy starts getting up but his dad stopps him. “We are not African Americans.”
Shortly after another announcement is made. “Ladies and gentlemen we are still to heavy. We must move to the B’s. Will all blacks please jump out of the plane.”
The boy starts getting up but his dad stops him again. “No son we are not black.”
Shortly after another announcement is made. “Ladies and gentlemen we are still to heavy, we must now move to the C’s. Will all colored people please jump out the plane.”
Again the boy starts getting up but his dad stops him. “No son were not colored.”
“But dad, if we’re not African American, black, or colored, what are we?”
“Son, today we’re niggеrs and we sure as hеll aint jumping before the Mexicans!”
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Your bedroom isn't cluttered; it's "passage-restrictive."
Kids don't get in trouble anymore. They merely hit "social speed bumps."
You're not having a bad hair day; you're suffering from "rebellious follicle syndrome."
No one's tall anymore. They're "vertically enhanced."
You're not shy. You're "conversationally selective."
You don't talk a lot. You're just "abundantly verbal."
It's not called gossip anymore. It's "transmission of near-factual information."
The food at the school cafeteria isn't awful. It's "digestively challenged."
Your homework isn't missing; it's just having an "out-of-notebook experience."
You're not sleeping in class; you're "rationing consciousness."
You don't have smelly gym socks; you have "odor-retentive athletic footwear."
You weren't passing notes in class. You were "participating in the discreet exchange of penned meditations."
You're not being sent to the principal's office. You're "going on a mandatory field trip to the administrative building."
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