Nancy Pelosi - “I’ve decided to make a dessert, It’s called a USA downside up cake. I have to bake it before I read the recipe.” 0 0 0
Did you hear about the politically correct country club?They no longer refer to their golfers as having handicaps.Instead they're "sтrоке challenged" 0 0 0
During a terrible storm, all the highway signs were covered with snow. The following spring, the state decided to raise all the signs twelve inches at a cost of six million dollars. “That’s an outrageous price!” said a local farmer, “but I guess we’re lucky the state handled it instead of the federal government.” “Why’s that?”“Because knowing the federal government, they’d decided to lower the highways.” 0 0 0
The newest Bible Book is The Book of Trump. Here is wisdom from the Prophet Himself. …….Trump 14:17-18 …… …..“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Deport him and you won’t have to feed him or his anchor babies ever again.” 0 0 0
Donald Trump was asked if he could quote any Bible verses. ….….He replied,”Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Deport him and you do not have to feed him again.”Trump 20:16 0 0 0
“What do you think of Red China?” One woman asked another during a party on world affairs.“Oh, I don’t know,” said the other woman. “I guess it would be all right if you use it on a white tablecloth.” 0 0 0
A black man was spying on me last night while I was watching Sperminator 2 on my pc. I now really regret voting for him in the 2012 elections. 0 0 0
Old man walks up and says,"For sixty years I've been trying to figure out why we vote in November. Finally found the answer this year.""Why's that?""Better selection of turkeys!" 0 0 0
A cannibal entered the meat market to buy something nice for dinner. The owner greeted him and told him to look around. The cannibal began to inspect the meat case and noticed the market specialized in brain.Upon further inspection he noticed a marked disparity between the costs of brain meats. A carpenter's brain sells for $1.50 per pound. A plumber's brain sells for $2.25 per pound. He noticed with alarm that a politician's brain sells for $375.00 a pound. With not a little curiosity he asked the owner why the huge difference in price between the similar meats.The owner responded with a deadpan look on his face, "Do you realize how many politicians it takes to get a pound of brains?" 0 0 0
A ventriloquist stops to entertain some people in a small town. He's going through his usual sтuрid George W. jokes, when George W. himself walks up."I've heard just about enough of your denigrating George W. jokes!" He says. "What makes you think you can stereotype me that way? What does a person's knowledge of geography and world politics have to do with their worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep people like me from being respected at work and in my community. I'm as smart as anyone else and..."The ventriloquist begins to apologize, when George W. stops him. "You stay out of this, Mister. I'm talking to that little smart aleck on your knee!" 0 0 0
What’s the difference between the USA and a bird? ….On a bird, the left wing and right wing work together for the benefit of the whole bird. 0 0 0
When the maintenance men removed the 10 Commandments from the courthouse, nobody said anything - until the statue fell off the dolly and cracked a little. Everybody yelled, "Run!" 0 0 0
It was revealed in a UK government survey that the prime minister was doing the work of two men...Those two men would be Laurel and Hardy. 0 0 0