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Funny Quotes

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Karma will find you. At home, at work, at Coldplay concerts.
Chadoy Leon
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Funny Quotes
You call it lazy, I call it selective participation.
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Funny Quotes
When told the reason for daylight savings time the Old Indian said, “Only the government would believe that you could cut a foot off the top of a blanket, sew it to the bottom, and have a longer blanket.”
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Funny Quotes Cowboys and Indians Jokes
I’m so old I remember when water was free and you had to pay for роrn.
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Funny Quotes
“If you think women are the weaker sеx, try pulling the blanket back to your side.”
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Stuart Turner“
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Funny Quotes
“Do you ever get halfway through eating a horse and go ‘you know, I’m not as hungry as thought I was’?”
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Tim VineI
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I have Alzheimer’s bulimia – first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke.
Cindy from Marzahn
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Funny Quotes
Short and funny quotes | Humorous comedy joke.
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Funny Quotes
“Everybody panic!”
Will Ferell
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Eternity is a very long time, especially towards the end.
Woddy Allen
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Funny Quotes
I believe there is something out there watching over us – unfortunately it's the government.
Woddy Allen
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Funny Quotes
"You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'see if you can вlоw this one out.'"
Jerry Seinfeld
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I have an intense desire to return to the wомв. Anybody's.
Woddy Allen
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Funny Quotes
Life is like a dogsled team.
If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
Lewis Grizzard
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Pet Jokes Dog jokes Funny Quotes
“They say the dog is man's best friend.
I don't believe that.
How many of your friends have you neutered?”
- Larry Reeb
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Pet Jokes Funny Quotes Dog jokes
“Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.”
—George Carlin
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If you want to кill a big dream, tell it to small minded people.
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“One beautiful heart is better than thousand beautiful faces.”
William Shakespeare
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Funny Quotes
“Never underestimate the power of sтuрid people in a large group.”
George Calin
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Funny Quotes
“A slаvе is one who waits for someone to come and free him.”
Ezra Pound.
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“Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness.”
Alejandro Jodorowksy
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“If the truth shall kilI them, let them dié.”
Immanuel Kant
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“No one is more hated than he who speaks the truth.”
Plato
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Мъже, женете се. Ако попаднете на добра и разбрана жена, ще живеете добре. Ако попаднете на лоша, ще станете философ. А това е добре за ч ...овечеството Dans tous les cas, mariez-vous : Si vous tombez sur une bonne épouse, vous serez heureux. Si vous tombez sur une mauvaise vous deviendrez philosophe, ce qui est excellent pour l'homme. Сократ, философ: - Женись несмотря ни на что. Если попадется хорошая жена, будешь счастливым, а если плохая - станешь философом. Ксантиппа, его жена: - Ты щас че сказал, козлина?! Источник:... Man sollte wirklich heiraten. Wenn man eine gute Frau bekommt, wird man glücklich. Wenn man eine schlechte Frau bekommt, wird man Philosoph. Socrates Natürlich solltest du heiraten. Wenn du eine gute Frau bekommst, wirst du glücklich. Und bei einer schlechten Frau, wirst du Philosoph. Sokrates 469 - 399 v. Christus Det lönar sig alltid att gifta sig, sa Sokrates på sin tid. - Är det en god hustru gör hon mannen lycklig. Är hustrun elak gör hon mannen till filosof. Zitat übers Heiraten: Heirate auf jeden Fall!Kriegst du eine gute Frau,wirst du glücklich.-Kriegst du eine böse,dann wirst du Philosoph. - Der Philosoph Sokrates 469 bis 399 vor Christus - Mano patarimas tau – vesk. Jei radai gerą žmoną, tu būsi laimingas. Jei ne – tapsi filosofu. (Socrates) "Съветвам ви да се ожените - ако попаднете на добра жена, ще сте щастливи. Aко не, ще станете философ." Сократ
My advice to you is get married: If you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
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Marriage and Family Jokes Funny Quotes
- ”The opinion of 10,000 men is of no value if none of them knows anything about the subject.”
Marcus Aurelius
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Когато глупостта се счита за патриотизъм, е опасно да си интелигентен. Айзък Азимов
When stupidity is considered patriotism, it is unsafe to be intelligent.
- Issac Asimov
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