Spanish jokes

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People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Spain.
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

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I always say muchos to spanish people.
It means a lot to them

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I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football.
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.

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My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Everyone seemed surprised.
Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition
Edit: expects*

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What do you call a group of confused Spanish speaking racists?
The ¿Qué Qué Qué?

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Canadian joke my dad used to tell me, wanted to see if it translates well...
Phillip: What did the Spanish priest say to the Iranian gynecologist?
Terrance: I don't know Phillip
Phillip: *Farts*

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My uncle runs a clinic inside a hotel in Spain
He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.
Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician

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I was at a restaurant that serves traditional Spanish food. I was shocked to see that they serve clamari, and with the squid's ink!
No one expects the Spanish ink cuisine!

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What do you call a baby elephant in Spanish?
El infant.

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A Spanish, Greek and Portuguese man go to a bar. Who pays for the drinks?
The German!

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Spanish Dad Joke
Dad: Son what are you drinking?
Son: Soy Milk
Dad: Hola Milk, me llamo Dad

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My neighbour's 4-year-old has been learning Spanish since lockdown.
He still can't say "please" though, which I think is poor for four.

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People are always amazed at the skilled tattoo artists in Spain.
No one expects the Spanish ink precision

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A cop pulled over a spanish photon...
The cop asked,
"Do you know how fast you were going?"
The photon said,
"C."

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Whenever I'm asked "What happened in 1492?", people are always surprised by my answer.
Nobody expects "The Spanish Inquisition".

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In a huge lecture hall once I only had four international students turn up - English, French, Spanish and German. I asked if they could all see me. They said...
Yes, Oui, Si, Ja

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So my Spanish teacher told me to turn in my essay
I told her I ain't no snitch

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I saw a Spanish magician last night.. he said "uno, dos.."
And then he disappeared without a tres

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