1. You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.
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2. The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
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3. The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape.
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4. Birds are attracted to your beard.
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5. Your wife’s job requires her to wear an orange vest.
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6. Your school fight song was “Dueling Banjos”
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7. You think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
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8. Your coffee table used to be a cable spool.
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9. You keep a can of RAID on the kitchen table.
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10. There are more than five McDonald’s bags in your car.
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Attribution: Jeff Foxworthy