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Вицове за кафето Coffee Jokes Kaffeewitze Chistes sobre el café Вицове про кофе Blagues sur le café Barzellette sul caffè Ανέκδοτα για τον καφέ Вицеви за кафе Kahve Fıkraları Анекдоти про каву Piadas sobre café Dowcipy o kawie Kaffeskämt Koffiemoppen Kaffevittigheder Kaffevitser Kahvivitsit Viccek a kávéról Glume despre cafea Vtipy o kávě Anekdotai apie kavą Joki par kafiju Vicevi o kavi
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Coffee Jokes

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Това, което кафеварката вижда първо сутрин. Ова што прво го гледа кафематот наутро. Lo primero que ve la cafetera por la mañana. Что кофеварка видит первым утром. Was die Kaffeemaschine morgens als Erstes sieht. Ce que voit la cafetière en premier le matin. Αυτό που βλέπει πρώτο η καφετιέρα το πρωί. Quello che la macchina del caffè vede per primo la mattina. Kahve makinesinin sabah ilk gördüğü şey. Що першою вранці бачить кавоварка. O que a cafeteira vê primeiro de manhã. To, co ekspres do kawy widzi jako pierwsze rano. Vad kaffebryggaren ser först på morgonen. Wat het koffiezetapparaat ’s ochtends als eerste ziet. Hvad kaffemaskinen ser først om morgenen. Hva kaffetrakteren ser først om morgenen. Mitä kahvinkeitin näkee ensimmäisenä aamulla. Amit a kávéfőző először lát reggel. Ce vede prima dată cafetiera dimineața. Co jako první ráno vidí kávovar. Ką pirmiausia ryte pamato kavos aparatas. Ko kafijas automāts vispirms redz no rīta. Što aparat za kavu prvo vidi ujutro.
What the coffee maker sees first thing in the morning.
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Coffee Jokes
Открих, че съм по-щастлив, откакто преминах от кафе на портокалов сок. Лекарят ми твърди, че е от витамин С- то и естествените захари, но аз мисля, че е от водката.
I noticed that I've been happier and calmer since I switched from coffee in the morning to orange juice:
My doctor explained it's probably the vitamin "C" and natural sugars, but I think it's the vodka
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Drinking and Drunk Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Coffee Jokes
Тези, които пият кафето без захар, докато се опитват да ти обяснят, че е страхотно. Оние што го пијат кафето без шеќер додека се обидуваат да ти објаснат дека е одлично. Los que toman café sin azúcar mientras intentan explicarte que está buenísimo. Те, кто пьют кофе без сахара, пока пытаются объяснить тебе, что оно вкусное. Diejenigen, die Kaffee ohne Zucker trinken, während sie dir erklären wollen, dass er köstlich ist. Ceux qui boivent leur café sans sucre en essayant de t’expliquer que c’est délicieux. Αυτοί που πίνουν τον καφέ χωρίς ζάχαρη ενώ προσπαθούν να σου εξηγήσουν ότι είναι πεντανόστιμος. Quelli che bevono il caffè senza zucchero mentre cercano di spiegarti che è buonissimo. Şekersiz kahve içip sana bunun harika olduğunu anlatmaya çalışanlar. Ті, хто п’ють каву без цукру, намагаючись пояснити тобі, що вона смачна. Aqueles que bebem café sem açúcar enquanto tentam explicar-te que é ótimo. Ci, którzy piją kawę bez cukru, próbując ci wytłumaczyć, że jest pyszna. De som dricker kaffe utan socker medan de försöker förklara för dig att det är jättegott. Degenen die koffie zonder suiker drinken terwijl ze je proberen uit te leggen dat het heerlijk is. Dem der drikker kaffe uden sukker, mens de prøver at forklare dig, at det er velsmagende. De som drikker kaffe uten sukker mens de prøver å forklare deg at det er kjempegodt. Ne jotka juovat kahvia ilman sokeria samalla kun yrittävät selittää sinulle, että se on tosi hyvää. Azok, akik cukor nélkül isszák a kávét, miközben próbálják megmagyarázni, hogy ez milyen finom. Cei care beau cafeaua fără zahăr în timp ce încearcă să-ți explice că este delicioasă. Ti, kteří pijí kávu bez cukru, zatímco se ti snaží vysvětlit, že je výborná. Tie, kurie geria kavą be cukraus ir bando tau paaiškinti, kad ji yra skani. Tie, kas dzer kafiju bez cukura, cenšoties paskaidrot, ka tā ir garšīga. Oni koji piju kavu bez šećera dok ti pokušavaju objasniti da je odlična.
Those who drink coffee without sugar while trying to explain to you that it's delicious.
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Coffee Jokes
Колегите: „Защо пиеш кафе всеки ден? Ще умреш ли без него?“ Аз: „Не… ама вие може.“ Колегите: „Зошто пиеш кафе секој ден? Ќе умреш ли без него?“ Јас: „Не… ама вие може.“ Los colegas: “¿Por qué tomas café todos los días? ¿Se mueren sin él?” Yo: “No… pero ustedes quizás.” Коллеги: «Зачем каждый день кофе? Умрёте без него?» Я: «Нет… а вот вы, может быть.» Kollegen: „Warum trinkt ihr jeden Tag Kaffee? Sterbt ihr sonst?“ Ich: „Nein… aber ihr vielleicht.“ Les collègues: «Pourquoi vous buvez du café tous les jours ? Vous mourrez sans ça ?» Moi : «Non… mais vous peut-être.» Οι συνάδελφοι: «Γιατί πίνετε καφέ κάθε μέρα; Θα πεθάνετε χωρίς αυτόν;» Ε γώ: «Όχι… αλλά εσείς μπορεί.» I colleghi: «Perché bevete caffè ogni giorno? Morite senza?» Io: «No… ma voi forse sì.» Meslektaşlar: “Neden her gün kahve içiyorsunuz? Onsuz ölür müsünüz?” Ben: “Hayır… ama siz belki.” Колеги: «Чому ви п'єте каву щодня? Без неї помрете?» Я: «Ні… але ви, може, так.» Colegas: “Por que vocês bebem café todos os dias? Morrem sem ele?” Eu: “Não… mas vocês talvez.” Koledzy: „Dlaczego pijecie kawę codziennie? Umrzecie bez niej?” Ja: „Nie… ale wy może.” Kollegor: ”Varför dricker ni kaffe varje dag? Dör ni annars?” Jag: ”Nej… men ni kanske.” Collega's: “Waarom drinken jullie elke dag koffie? Ga je dood zonder?” Ik: “Nee… maar jullie misschien wel.” Kollegaer: ”Hvorfor drikker I kaffe hver dag? Dør I uden det?” Mig: ”Nej… men I måske.” Kollegaer: ”Hvorfor drikker dere kaffe hver dag? Dør dere ellers?” Meg: ”Nei… men dere kanskje.” Kollegat: ”Miksi juotte kahvia joka päivä? Kuolisitteko ilman?” Minä: ”En… mutta te ehkä.” Kollégák: „Miért isztok kávét minden nap? Meghaltok nélküle?” Én: „Nem… de ti talán.” Colegii: „De ce beți cafea în fiecare zi? Muriți fără ea?” Eu: „Nu… dar voi poate.” Kolegové: „Proč pijete kávu každý den? Umřete bez ní?“ Já: „Ne… ale vy možná.“ Kolegos: „Kodėl geriate kavą kasdien? Numirtumėte be jos?“ Aš: „Ne… bet jūs gal.“ Kolēģi: „Kāpēc jūs dzerat kafiju katru dienu? Bez tās nomirsiet?“ Es: „Nē… bet jūs varbūt.“ Kolege: „Zašto pijete kavu svaki dan? Umrli biste bez nje?“ Ja: „Ne… ali vi možda.“
Colleagues: “Why do you drink coffee every day? Will you die without it?”  Me: “No… but you might.”
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Coffee Jokes
- Kan jag få en kopp kaffe utan grädde? - Vi har ingen grädde. - Kan jag få en kopp kaffe utan mjölk då? A man is sitting in a cafe. A blonde waitress approaches and asks for his order. “I’d like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream," he says. The blonde waitress replies, “I’m sorry, sir, but we’re... Klant tegen ober: ''een kopje koffie zonder melk'' Ober: ''de melk is op, meneer. Mag het ook een kopje koffie zonder slagroom zijn? Un tip intra In bar si comanda: - O cafea fara Frisca, va rog! Barmanul se uita Chioras la el si ii spune: - Sa Stiti ca frisca s-a terminat, dar mai avem Niste lapte. Daca doriti va pot face o... Jeg kom inn på en kafé og bestilte en kaffe uten fløte. -Vi har dessverre ikke fløte men kan du ta uten melk?
A man gave the waiter his order, "Black coffee, no cream"
The waiter came back and apologized, "I'm sorry, we're out of cream. Would you take your coffee without milk?"
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Men jokes Waiter Jokes Coffee Jokes
Coffee is the silent victim in our house. It gets mugged every day.
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Good jokes Coffee Jokes
A tall blonde walks into Starbucks. The barista says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you!”
The blonde says, “You have a drink named Tiffani?”
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Coffee Jokes Blonde Jokes
Why shouldn’t you discuss coffee in polite company?
It can make for a strong and heated debate.
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Coffee Jokes
Why did the espresso keep checking his watch?
Because he was pressed for time.
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Coffee Jokes
A man went to his psychiatrist and complained that every time he drinks coffee, he would get a stabbing pain in his right eye.
The psychiatrist said, “Well, have you tried taking the spoon out?”
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Coffee Jokes
I just got myself a top of the range coffee maker.
It has a lot of perks.
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Coffee Jokes
A guy walks into a cafe and orders a coffee to go.
The coffee gets up and leaves.
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Coffee Jokes
What currency can we use to buy coffee in space?
S T A R B U C K S.
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Coffee Jokes
Did you hear about the guy who put little G.I. Joe soldiers at the bottom of his coffee cup?
He’d heard that the best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!
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Coffee Jokes Military Jokes
“Hey barista, how much for a cup of coffee?” says a customer.
“Two dollars,” replies the barista, “and refills are free.” “Great. Then I’ll have a refill,” answers the customer.
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Coffee Jokes
People ask me if I wake up grumpy in the morning
No, I say. I just bring him some coffee.
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Coffee Jokes
Why do I not like hot drinks?
It’s just not my cup of tea.
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Coffee Jokes
I tried brewing my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.
I drank it and left my house to go to work. After 15 minutes I realized I forgot my car.
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Coffee Jokes
Why can Starbucks get away with charging outrageous prices for coffee?
Because they have Italian titles for everything!
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Coffee Jokes
How do you make Pig Jerky?
Give them some coffee.
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Coffee Jokes
"Mom's recipe for iced coffee: 1. Have kids. 2. Make coffee. 3. Forget you made coffee. 4. Drink it cold."
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Mom jokes Coffee Jokes
"Let's get married and have kids so instead of enjoying coffee in the morning, you can braid hair while I pack lunches, and we can all be late." @simoncholland
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Mom jokes Coffee Jokes
“Before my first cup of coffee I hate everybody. That doesn’t change after I’ve had that coffee, but it feels much better.”
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Funny sayings Coffee Jokes
What is Korean Dracula's favorite morning beverage?
Koh-peee! (coffee)
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Korean jokes Vampire jokes Coffee Jokes
T. S. Eliot measured out his life with coffee spoons.
Chuck Norris uses a backhoe.
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Chuck Norris Jokes Coffee Jokes
An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h at 30,000 feet, when suddenly an Eurofighter with a Tempo Mach 2 appears.
The pilot of the fighter jet slows down, flies alongside the Airbus and greets the pilot of the passenger plane by radio: "Airbus, boring flight isn’t it? Now have a look here!"
He rolls his jet on its back, accelerates, breaks through the sound barrier, rises rapidly to a dizzying height, and then swoops down almost to sea level in a breathtaking dive. He loops back next to the Airbus and asks: "Well, how was that?"
The Airbus pilot answers: "Very impressive, but watch this!"
The jet pilot watches the Airbus, but nothing happens. It continues to fly straight, at the same speed. After 15 minutes, the Airbus pilot radios, "Well, how was that?
Confused, the jet pilot asks, "What did you do?"
The Airbus pilot laughs and says: "I got up, stretched my legs, walked to the back of the aircraft to use the washroom, then got a cup of coffee and a chocolate fudge pastry."
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Aviation Jokes Chocolate Jokes Pilot Jokes Coffee Jokes
Two deaf men were in a coffee shop discussing their wives.
One signs to the other, boy was my wife mad at me last night!
She went on and on and wouldn't stop!
The other Buddy says when my wife goes off on me I just don't listen.
How do you do that? Says the other.
It's easy! I turn off the light!
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Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes Coffee Jokes
The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
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Chuck Norris Jokes Coffee Jokes
I'd love to take you out for coffee this week.
You spelled wine wrong.
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Wine jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Coffee Jokes
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